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“See? That would have been good information to have, to at least know that you were trying.”
“What kind of man would it make me if I came to you with half-filled promises? Trying and doing are two different things. After everything I did, you deserve better than that.”
Anna sat down on the sofa, seeming deep in thought, but not saying a thing. Was he finally getting somewhere? He had to keep going.
“Anna, darling, I want you back. I think you know that. My feelings for you didn’t go away when you said you were done with me. I still love you.” He drew in a deep breath as he sensed his voice was about to break. Just thinking about today, about the baby, made his heart ache. “Now more than ever.”
She raised her head slowly, her forehead creased with worry. “Because of the baby.”
He took the seat beside her. “Some of it is, of course. There’s no separating the two. But my love for you was there before you got pregnant, and it will be there tomorrow. It’s not going anywhere. I’m not going anywhere.”
“You’re on a high right now from hearing the baby’s heartbeat, from the excitement of what’s new. How are you going to feel when we’re forced to deal with my family? How are you going to feel if we lose the baby?”
Indeed, the road ahead was not getting any easier. He simply needed to know one thing. “Do you have feelings for me?”
She looked at him, scanning his face for what felt like a lifetime. “Part of me does. Part of me wants to punch you for what you did. It’s hard for me to trust you. When I look back at our time together, all I can think about is everything you were keeping from me. That’s hard to get past.”
“Then maybe you need to try harder. I’ll tell you I’m sorry until I’m blue in the face, but we had good times, too. Spectacular times. We had moments where I wasn’t sure another person existed on the planet. Don’t give up on our good memories. We can make more.” He took her hand, relieved that she didn’t fight the gesture. Body warmth traveled so easily between them—why couldn’t everything else between them be so simple? Why couldn’t things go back to the way they’d been at the beginning? So elemental. “I can’t change the past. All I can do is try to build a future, but you hold the key. I can’t do it without you.”
She dropped her sights to their hands, joined. A tear fell onto her lap, darkening the fabric of her pants. “I need time to think. Today was a lot to deal with.”
He nodded. Not that he had much choice, but he could accept that. He’d make do with a sliver of a chance. “I’ll wait, but let me know if there’s anything I can do to speed up the process.”
“Right now, more than anything, I just need to know that you’re not only in my corner, but that you’re going to stay there.”
“I am Anna. I am.”
“I mean it, Jacob. For real.”
He sucked in a deep breath of resolve. “I do, too. And I’ll find a way to show you. I won’t let you down.”
Jacob rode the elevator to the lobby, deep in thought. So much had changed in the past few weeks. From the miserable depths of losing Anna, he had new hope. He couldn’t afford to doubt the future—she was the one questioning what tomorrow held. He hated seeing that from her. She was the optimist, the sunniest part of his life.
He had to show her that there was more for them. It was the only way back into her heart. That meant showing her that he wasn’t going anywhere.
When the doors slid open to the lobby, he was so immersed in his thoughts that he nearly flattened a man rushing on to the elevator.
“Sorry,” the man said, holding up a blue Tiffany shopping bag. “Forgot the wedding anniversary yesterday. I’m in a hurry to get out of the doghouse.”
“No problem,” Jacob answered, turning and watching the elevator doors slide closed. That flash of Tiffany blue was still there in his head.
If he wanted to show Anna that he wasn’t going anywhere, he needed to make his overture. The question was when he would find the right moment.
Sixteen
Disbelief choked Jacob as he read the email the next morning—the missing piece of the puzzle, the information he’d been waiting on, sent by one of his informants. The identity of the high roller joining the War Chest was now known. Aiden Langford. And to think he’d woken up wondering when the right time would come to propose to Anna. That would need to be put off for at least another day.
