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I immediately give the drink to Leyna. ‘Here Leyna, you take this one, I’ll get another.’
‘Oh, it’s okay—’
‘Please. It’s no bother. Should be a good show tonight,’ I say, staring out at the crowd of people already gathered in the seats with more coming in by the minute. ‘I hope you like spoken word performances.’
‘I do!’ Leyna says cheerily.
Charis glares out into the crowd in the huff, like she’s about to set someone on fire with her dragon eyes. I guess this means she’s no longer speaking to me. So much for trying to be collegiate. I didn’t want to be here before and I certainly don’t want to be here now. I have no idea what’s gotten into Charis, but I can think of a million places I’d rather be. Yet again, I’m reminded why I keep my distance from my work colleagues. One minute, they’re rational human beings, the next they’re mad as a bag of ferrets. I tell myself that this is the last poetry evening I’ll ever have to do. Once this is over, I’m done.
Rather than mingling with the students, I let Charis do the schmoozing. Leyna and I stand together behind the tables, towards the far end of the café. In the shadows.
We listen to Denise Unsworth, the invited speaker, and she’s magical on stage. It’s always amazing to be in the presence of someone who loves what they’re doing—who is sogoodat what they do. I can see Leyna is listening with rapt attention, too, but I’m still thinking about Charis’ comments earlier, as though this isn’t a public performance where anyone can turn up. As though a member of the departmental support staff team couldn’t possibly find an English Department event of interest. The longer I stand there, Leyna by my side, the more I fume about it all.
‘I’m glad you’re here, Leyna,’ I whisper in her ear.
‘Is Charis always such a bitch or is it just me?’ Leyna whispers back. ‘We really ought to give her something to talk about...’ she says quietly.
‘What was that?’
Leyna turns to look at me. ‘Remember when we were are the Botanic Gardens the other day? Remember how exciting it was, just the thought ofgetting caught?’
Leyna had that sparkle in her eye again. I knew by now that look meant trouble was brewing. ‘I enjoyed having lunch with you,’ I reply in a neutral voice.
‘Oh, come on! Doesn’t it excite you, even a little?’ she asks quietly. ‘The prospect of being found out. Of getting caught in the middle of something, even if neither one of us truly believes what we’re doing iswrongin any way, whatever that means... Isn’t it a little bit exciting?’ She prods me.
I should have known that afirst datewith Leyna wasn’t going to be straightforward.
‘The fun part,’ she continues, ‘is in taking the game too far. In crossing that line and then seeing just what comes as a result. And in upturning the expectations others have of you...’
Leyna was worrying me now as her eyes gleamed with mischief.
‘Don’t look so scared, Jack. I’ve not done anything. Not yet.’
I could see Charis out of the corner of my eye. She eyes us and starts to make her way over, but I don’t want Leyna to have to listen to any more snide remarks or passive-aggressive put-downs.
Leyna leans in close to me and, to anyone around us, it simply looks like she’s whispering something because it would be rude to speak loudly during the performance on stage. However, Leyna’s words are blunt and provocative as she whispers, ‘Go on, Jack. Cross the line. Take it too far.’
My ears ring with her words and my heart thuds loudly with each punishing beat. Charis is walking this way, slowly through the throng of people, stopping occasionally to say hello, all while Leyna is whispering devilish taunts in my ear. There are students everywhere, a few colleagues, Charis...
I slip my arm around Leyna’s waist and draw her so close to me that we are glued together side by side. As far as moves went, an arm around the waist was practically platonic for the two of us. And yet... There was nothing platonic about the way we stood here together, side by side, breath bated and stunted, wondering if this was the right thing to do or not. One thing was certain, though, work colleagues and friends don’t stand together the way we’re currently standing.
I know it.
Leyna knows it.
And now Charis knows it, too.
From the corner of my eye, I quickly glance across the room, towards where Charis is slowly making her way towards us and I know she’s seen the move because her step falters a little. Everyone else is focused on the speaker on stage but Charis now looks like she’s thinking twice about whether to come this way or not. I lean down, so that my hot breath tickles Leyna’s skin, ‘Is this far enough, Flower?’
Leyna draws in a sharp breath at the pet name I love to call her and whips her head so our faces are now touching. It happens so quickly that my arm automatically adjusts to the new position and we stand at the back of the café, veiled in the shadows, and she touches a finger to my lip then whispers against them: ‘Now we’ve crossed the line.’
It takes everything I have not to devour her then and there. I steal a glance across the room and notice that Charis has stopped dead in her tracks, staring, jaw on the floor.
‘I think you’ve made your point,’ I whisper back to Leyna. ‘Let’s get out of here before we really take it too far. Charis has noticed us.’
‘Has she?’ Leyna asks nonchalantly, as though she didn’t already know. ‘You do realise everyone in the department is going to have heard about this public display, right?’
Leyna is right. Nothing stays quiet here for very long. The university, in many ways, is like a small town of its own with all of the typical characters, the heroes, the villains, and everyone in between. I had no doubt they’d all know about this sooner rather than later, but, for once, I didn’t care. The truth is, Leyna and I aren’t just workmates or work colleagues. We’re something more, something still indefinable, butit isn’t platonic, and I didn’t care who knew. ‘Fuck ‘em.’ It felt so good to utter those words. I’d had enough. ‘Let’s get out of here.’
