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Maybe some space and an hour or two to think would help. “As fun as this is, I need a break from the terror and attempted kidnappings and never-ending need to throw up. I’m heading upstairs.”
They all stared at her but Ben spoke up. “You okay?”
Clearly her voice had given her away. Either that or in her need for sleep she’d said something she only meant to think. “Not really.”
Ben’s arm slipped along the back of her chair and his fingers massaged her neck. The slow circle eased the thumping headache and kick-started a twirling in her stomach.
Some of the fatigue seeped out of her body and a new sensation set in. It looked as though her fear of gun-toting, commanding, strong men might be gone thanks to Ben.
On the list of everything about him that made her smile she added his tendency for public displays of affection. He had no trouble showing he cared for her in front of his friends. He didn’t embarrass her or violate her privacy. She couldn’t help but sink into the intimate way he touched her, as if it was something as matter-of-fact and normal as drinking coffee.
“You did great today,” he said.
His automatic support was pretty great, too. From him that meant a lot, but she wasn’t exactly ready to collect a medal for bravery. “I was plastered against the floor hoping not to get killed.”
Joel smiled at her over the top of the laptop. “You stayed calm and called the warning that likely saved Ben’s life.”
“Damn,” Ben groaned. “I meant to tell you not to share that yet.”
All exhaustion vanished as she sat up straight. “What?”
“The trajectory of the hit on the attacker next to Ben suggested the bullet was aimed right at Ben’s...” Joel froze in the process of turning the computer around to show her whatever was on his screen and stared at Ben instead. “What?”
Ben slipped his hand under her hair and turned her face toward him. “I’m fine. Thanks to you.”
No, no, no. She had almost sat there and watched him get shot, all for her annoying habits and need to have repetition and uniformity.
She almost doubled over. “Now I am going up to vomit.”
“You’re fine.”
“Don’t bet on it.” She had to get out of there. Find a quiet minute alone. So much had happened and she hadn’t found two seconds to process it all.
She stood up, planning to find a shower and maybe sit on the bathroom floor by the toilet for a few minutes just in case. “I’m thinking it’s inevitable at this point.”
Ben winced. “In that case I might wait a while before I head up to join you.”
Something about the big strong man being afraid of a woman getting sick made her laugh. “Chicken.”
Because she couldn’t resist, she brushed her fingers through his soft hair as she walked by. She wanted to lean down and kiss him, but that could be too much. With the world spinning and someone trying to grab her every two seconds, they hadn’t exactly had a moment to sit down and talk about a definition for their relationship...if that was what it was.
He struck her as rock-solid, but kissing him in front of the guys could be the move that finally made him go all anti-commitment-male crazy. She just couldn’t handle that loss on top of everything else.
“Hey, what was the teller’s name?” Ben asked her as she reached the doorway to the main hall.
“What are you talking about?” Jocelyn gripped the doorjamb as she turned around. “Oh, you mean Pamela?”
Connor’s eyebrow lifted. “Last name?”
Jocelyn was still stuck on the last question. “You think she has something to do with this?”
“She’s the teller you go to regularly. You see her, she disappears and during the same time frame your life goes haywire. Seems too convenient not to be suspect,” Joel explained as he typed away.
Ben glared at him. “Disappeared might be a strong word,” he pointed out.
Jocelyn’s head had taken off in a full spin now.
“Don’t worry,” Ben said. “We’ll find out.”
As Jocelyn walked up the steps, she thought of all the things she wasn’t supposed to worry about. Her emotional baggage just got heavier with each passing second.
* * *
BEN FELT THE SENSATION of being stared at and decided not to lift his head and face whatever bugged Connor. Studying the file of Davis’s notes provided cover. Not that Ben could read it. He stared at the words and lines of blue blur. All he could think about was the woman upstairs who could even now be stripping off her clothes and getting into a shower.
His control shattered.
“What about you? You okay?” Connor asked, clearly refusing to be ignored.
