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“You appear to be a little troubled, Miss Fullerton. Will you not look at me?”
For whatever reason, it took Deborah a great deal of effort to lift her gaze, and, when she finally did so, her heart slammed so hard into her chest that she was forced to catch her breath.
“Dancing with me is not so frightening, I hope?”
“Itisquite terrifying, Lord Havisham,” she managed to reply, unable to hold his gaze steadily. “Not that it is with you, but rather that I am waltzing at all!” At this, Lord Havisham let out a soft chuckle and Deborah managed a small smile in return. “I am quite certain that everyone is watching me.”
“They might well be, but that is just as we wish it, is it not?”
Deborah’s lips twisted to one side, but she did not say a word of response.
“If we are to find you a good match, then you must realize that gentlemen need to be aware of you?” His hand tightened on hers, his other about her waist and Deborah could not find any strength to respond. She was much too aware of him, aware of his strength and his overwhelming presence. Her stomach was churning furiously, her skin burning with heat which did not dissipate, no matter how long she waited. Her mind was filled with thoughts only of Lord Havisham and, whilst she found herself anxious and worried about dancing with him in such a manner, at the same time, Deborah did not want the dance to ever end. “And I must speak to you about Lord Thornley.”
At such a change in conversation, Deborah looked back up at him in surprise, seeing the frown now flickering across his brow and the way that his smile had faded.
“Oh?”
He opened his mouth to speak, but at that very moment, the music began to slow, signaling the end of the dance. Lord Havisham grimaced and, much to Deborah’s astonishment, tugged her a little closer as though he were entirely reluctant to allow her free of him. Looking up into his face, Deborah held Lord Havisham’s gaze for some moments as everything else seemed to fade away. Then the music was at an end and the conversation around them soon quickly began to flow but still, Deborah could not look away. Lord Havisham closed his eyes and let out a long breath which danced across her cheek and sent a swirl of butterflies into her stomach.
“I should return you to my mother.” His voice was low, his words dragging out slowly. “I had hoped to speak to you but mayhap…” His lips curved gently, and he slowly released her hand, his other one falling from her waist. “Later this evening or the morrow shall suffice.”
Deborah could not speak, but managed a small nod, the butterflies in her stomach still fluttering furiously. Feeling curiously empty now that he had released her from his embrace, she turned and accepted his arm, walking alongside him so that they might return to where Lady Havisham was waiting. The broad smile on the lady’s face told Deborah that she believed the evening to have gone very well, and that the dance with Lord Havisham had done exactly as it had intended – but that in itself brought Deborah no pleasure. She only found herself a little disappointed that the waltz was now at an end.
“That was very well done,” Lady Havisham murmured, clearly not wishing to make too much of what had taken place. “There was much attention placed on you, Miss Fullerton! I am sure that you will have many gentlemen seeking out your company very soon.”
This did not bring Deborah a thrill of delight as she had expected it to, and she struggled to smile. “I am very grateful, I am sure.”
“And you, my dear boy!” Lady Havisham put one hand on Lord Havisham’s arm, looking up at him with a warm, broad smile. “I am a little surprised at just how well you danced. I was quite certain that you had forgotten how to waltz entirely!”
This teasing made Deborah smile and Lord Havisham chuckle. As he continued to speak to his mother, Deborah found herself a little distracted by a quiet conversation that was taking place behind her, quite certain that she had heard her name mentioned.
“I do not know what Lord Havisham was thinking.”
“To stand up with someone so low in status!”
They are talking about me.A quick glance around told her that three young ladies were standing behind her and making very little effort to hide their voices. Her shoulders drooped but Deborah told herself plainly that she did not need to stand and listen to such disparaging remarks. It would only bring her anxiety as well and was taking the joy from the few minutes she had enjoyed in Lord Havisham’s arms. Her heartbeat still a little rapid, she leaned forward towards Lady Havisham, begging to be excused for a few moments to refresh herself. Nodding, Lady Havisham was quickly drawn back into conversation and Deborah hurried away, not wanting to linger and hear whoever was talking about either herself or Lord Havisham in such terms. It would not take her long, but by the time she returned, Deborah prayed that the ladies would have moved away or been taken to dance and allow her the rest of the evening free of their unwelcome company.
* * *
“I believethat Lord Havisham is quite the bachelor.”
Deborah’s stomach dropped as she moved forward, stopping a short distance away. The ladies who had been talking of her and Lord Havisham were still present, although there were only two of them now, rather than three.
“Mayhap this Miss Fullerton wishes to try to catch him for herself!”
The laughter that followed sent Deborah’s heart spiraling towards the ground.
“She will soon find thatIam the one who will gain Lord Havisham’s full attention,” said the first. “He has already shown me significant interest, and I do not think it will take him long to understand just how much he could gain from a connection with me. I will make certain that he understands it, if I must.”
The second lady tilted her head, her voice still clear as Deborah took a step closer, wanting now to listen for a little longer. This sounded somewhat concerning and, whilst it was not her business as to whom Lord Havisham took as a bride, Deborah could not help but listen on.
“Make certain?” the second lady asked, a small injection of laughter, running through her voice. “Whatever can you mean?”
A small, quiet laugh came from the first lady.
“There are ways and means of trapping a gentleman, Lady Catherine, even if it does mean soiling my reputationjusta little.”
Deborah’s heart turned over in her chest. She did not recognize the lady who was speaking, and yet had no doubt that it was Lord Havisham that she spoke of. Uncertain of what to do, she made to step forward, only for someone to tap her on the shoulder.
