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The tentacles were around my chest now, squeezing tighter and tighter. I clawed at them, digging my nails into their slick, slimy flesh, but they couldn’t be moved. Then they were around my shoulders...around my throat. They were squeezing until I couldn’t breathe.
“You never should have defied Me. You stole yourself away from Me. But I will have what’s Mine.”
The tentacles coiled around my face. I squeezed my eyes shut as they probed at my lids, at my mouth. I couldn’t breathe —I couldn’t breathe—
“Juniper!”
I thrashed, screaming, striking with my fists, kicking hard, struggling until the shock of cold water jolted my eyes open. I was crouched on the shore, pebbles beneath my hands. Zane stood over me, golden eyes narrowed in confusion as he watched me. I scrambled to my feet and turned in circles, looking everywhere, my heart pounding in my ears.
“What the hell happened?” His voice was dark, vicious. The sound of it made me finally remember to breathe.
“I, uh...I…” My voice caught. I was shaking violently with cold. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know how I could possibly explain that. Finally, I choked out, “The God found me. It found me.”
Even knowing he would believe me, the fear was still there: the terror of being laughed at, of being told I’d imagined it all. Even as I explained what I’d seen, the words pouring out in a flood, I was second-guessing myself. Had I exerted myself too much and passed out? Had I been hallucinating? Had I seen the red creature at all?
But when I’d finished telling it all, Zane’s face was hard with worry.
“It was a Watcher,” he said. “They’re parasitic monsters, attracted to the prey of other creatures.”
I frowned, shivering again beneath the blanket over my shoulders. “Why? What the hell does it want?”
“To feed. Watchers seek out the prey of larger, more dangerous creatures. In Hell, they’re known to follow Reapers around so they can feed on the fear of their victims. That’s what sustains it: fear. It will aid whatever is hunting you to increase your fear, your panic. By itself, there’s little it can do to harm you. But it can make you vulnerable. It can overwhelm you, distract you — that’s how it hunts.”
I’d never encountered anything like that. The sight of those wide, lidless eyes staring blankly at me wouldn’t leave my head. It twisted my stomach, burned into my mind.
“What can I do?” I said. “How can I kill it?”
“I don’t know if you can.” Zane rubbed his hand over his head in thought. “The best thing you can do, if you see it again, is ignore it. Pretend it isn’t there, don’t give in to the fear.”
Far easier said than done. Fear was a fact of life. I’d learned to operate despite it; erasing it entirely was impossible.
“When I was unconscious, the God said Itfoundme.” I bit my lip, hardly daring to ask the question. “Does that...does that mean It knows where I am? Does that mean It can...take me?”
Zane moved closer to me, tugging me into his warmth. I curled against his side, still shivering, trying to ease down my lingering panic.
“When the Libiri cut you and threw you down in the dark, the God got Its influence deep in your mind,” he said. “Demons have a similar power: I can give you the sensation of phantom touches, or create the illusion that you’re restrained.” Those phantom fingers traced along my neck as he spoke. I’d gotten used to that little mind trick of his, although I still didn’t understand how it worked. “Gods can do that too, but of course, their power is usually greater than a demon’s. They can create far more powerful, frightening sensations.”
I didn’t want to close my eyes. I was afraid that if I dared, for even a moment, I’d find myself back in the dark again, with those tentacles curling around my body.
“It’s an illusion, Juniper,” Zane said. “I know it feels real, but it’s just the God pushing Its influence over your mind and forcing you to feel things that aren’t there. That’s why It waits for you to be vulnerable, that’s why It comes to you in your sleep. The Watcher will try to give the God more opportunities to get to you. If it can panic you, if it can find a way to terrify you, it will. But the God is still trapped, Juniper. It can’t reach you. Remember that: no matter what It says, no matter what awful things It shows you, the God can’t touch you.”
34
If I had to choose one thing to do on Earth — besides collecting mortal souls — I’d choose to party.
Don’t get me wrong, a party on Earth was never going to compare to what went down in Hell. A mortal wouldn’t even survive a Hell party; if the recreational substances didn’t immediately kill them, sheer exhaustion would. Hell could rage for days on end, formonthsif the company was good enough.
But human parties were so earnest, so sweetly desperate. The pungent stench of alcohol, of sweat, of needy horny mortals all hoping for the opportunity to fuck. Humans couldn’t hold their liquor for shit either. All of them would be stumbling around like toddlers within a few hours, losing control of all emotions and bodily functions.
It was cute. They wanted stimulation so badly, but once they had it, their little mortal brains couldn’t handle it.
To say I was looking forward to the Hadleigh party was an understatement. I was frankly ecstatic.
Juniper was a bundle of nerves, but I fucked her good and got a shot of whiskey in her, and she mellowed out after that. But her excitement lingered in twitchy hands, fingers rubbing together, clenching, continually running through her hair.
The Watcher had her spooked, and I didn’t blame her. By demonic standards, they were generally harmless creatures, regardless of how unpleasant they were to look at. But Juniper was exactly the kind of being they’d want to prey on. She was brave as hell, but bravery didn’t mean she wasn’t afraid.
She lived with a deep, dark well of fear within her, and it was a precarious balance she walked day after day to not fall into the depths.
