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No, the problem came with the talking. Always the talking.
Cam glanced up and stopped working. “Why are you here?”
Holt knew that was a bad sign of the conversations to come. It didn’t help that Cam and Shane kept looking at each other, talking some language that they spoke and he didn’t seem to.
So he went with the obvious answer. “I lead the team.”
“I meant, why aren’t you in bed with Lindsey?” Cam asked.
“I would be,” Shane said at the same time.
That was just about enough of that. “We need to get home for the debrief.”
Holt said it even though he sort of dreaded it this time around. Walking into the apartment meant stepping into a place without her. Her house smelled good, like a mix of her shampoo and something cooking on the stove. He generally ordered takeout when not out on the job.
Man, he really was a confirmed bachelor.
“Wait, does that mean you blew it already?” Shane asked as he stood up and came over to join them on the tarmac.
Cam nodded. “I think so.”
Okay, Holt officially hated that conclusion. “No.”
Cam leaned against the plane. “Does she think you blew it?”
All of a sudden the guy was a dating expert. Though Holt had to admit he kind of was. He was in a committed relationship. They talked about a future. Holt thought about a future and felt everything inside him clench. Well, it used to. Not lately, but he was sure the sensation of being strangled would come back.
Until then he had a much bigger problem. “I don’t know what she wants.”
“Oh, boy.” Cam dropped his clipboard on the ground.
Again with the looks between Shane and Cam. They glanced and smiled, almost laughed. Holt wasn’t loving the byplay. That sort of thing was much more fun when he wasn’t the victim. “Okay, enough. What is it?”
Cam shrugged. “You missed a cue. That’s almost always it.”
Holt didn’t even know what those words meant in the context of a woman. “Speak slower.”
Shane rolled his eyes. “What did she say she wanted?”
This was downright embarrassing. Holt wasn’t accustomed to spilling his guts about a woman. Some things a guy should keep to himself and just handle.
Then he remembered the look on Lindsey’s face. A mix of hurt and anger, and he tried to put the ego aside. “I don’t know. More time together.”
“And what did you say?” Cam asked.
“I like her.” He almost shouted the phrase as a plane passed overhead.
They both stared at him and not in a good way.
Cam bit his upper lip. “Wow.”
Shane shook his head. “That’s terrible.”
Tough talk coming from a guy with an awful divorce in his recent past. Holt wanted to point that out, but it seemed like a jerk move, so he let it pass. “Like you would be better.”
Shane snorted. “A puppy would do better.”
Holt refused to debate based on the animal kingdom. “What do I do?”
“Do you love her?” Cam asked.
The question made him twitchy. Holt got that Cam had figured this relationship stuff out and was happy for him. Holt thought about love and the future and mortgages and felt something inside him go haywire. “It’s too soon.”
Cam looked at Shane. “I didn’t hear a no.”
The last thing Holt needed was these two bonding together on this topic. He was just looking for a little advice here. Simple stuff...stuff that he sucked at. “I care about her.”
Shane shook his head. “Stop saying that before she kills you.”
Holt was two seconds from going out and asking a cat or dog for advice. “You two aren’t helping.”
“Here’s my suggestion.” Cam pointed at the bag near Holt’s feet. “Take your bag, go back there and tell her what you really feel. Inside. The hard stuff.”
That sounded both easy and really hard. Holt didn’t like the downside risk. “Are you messing with me?”
“I’m trying to help you get your woman back before you lose her.”
The thought of that knocked out any concern about talking about his feelings. He’d open up all day if it stopped her from giving up on him. Holt hated that idea. “I don’t want that.”
“Then go tell her.” Shane and Cam said it at the same time.
So, they agreed with each other on that one. Holt took that as a good sign.
Chapter Twenty-One
Lindsey sat on her front porch with a glass of lemonade between her palms. The ice cubes chilled her, but she didn’t put it down. She couldn’t really move. She was too busy sitting and staring and doing nothing.
