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I considered her words. I wanted to believe her, but I felt it in my gut. If the truth got out about Art and me, all hell would break loose. “What if he wants kids?”
“Well, you mentioned not long ago wishing you’d had a daughter. Have a baby with Art.” Tina wiggled her eyebrows.
“I’d meant wanting a daughter with Matt. I’m too old to have a baby now.”
Tina rolled her eyes. “Mercy woman, you are not old. Women have babies into their forties every day.”
“Twelve years is a considerable age gap, Tina.”
“Men get with much younger women all the time. Why should it only be okay for them and not women?”
“I don’t know.”
“Listen, honey. You deserve to be happy and loved. If Art is the man, then let nature take its course. Don’t fight it. Love and be loved.”
“He’s going with Storm to meet with Deek. I’m so worried something will happen to him.” I wiped my runny nose. “It’s like I’m afraid to love anyone because they’re always taken from me.”
“Sweetie, you’ve suffered so much loss. If something, God forbid, happens to him, will you regret not telling him how you feel?”
“Probably. I care deeply for him. I love him, but what’s the cost? What if my boys hate the idea of me being with Art? What if the club doesn’t approve?”
“It’s your life, honey. Don’t let anyone dictate how you live it. Loving Art isn’t a crime. Being with him is nobody’s business.”
“I wish I were as confident as you.”
“Trust me, I didn’t get this way overnight.” She winked. “I’ll stand by you. I’m pretty sure all the old ladies will stand with you, Maddy especially.”
“It would help to have her on my side to help with Storm.”
“You won’t need help with Storm. He loves you. He’ll understand.”
I snorted and shook my head. “I’m not so sure.” I pulled the blanket under my chin. “I’ve never been so afraid in my whole life. Life as I know it could crash down all around me.”
“I understand, but what’s the alternative?”
“I could give Jack a fair chance. He really is a good man. Storm already said he’d release me from the club so I could be with him.”
Surprise flashed on her face. “He did? He knows about Jack but not about Art?”
“When the Soldiers were here last month, I had to tell Storm the truth so he’d let me go to Arizona. It was too stressful being around Jack and Art at the same time.”
“Well, now your little trip makes sense. Markey must’ve really loved it there to not return yet.”
I might as well get everything off my chest. “He’s been helping Mickey search for her son, Jax.”
“He’s missing?”
“Yes. He’s a little older than my boys. Remember when Mickey showed up here last summer?”
Tina nodded.
“She thought he might have come to her hometown but he wasn’t here.”
“That’s so hard. Why doesn’t Mickey tell him who his father is?”
“Because she doesn’t know who he is. She’d been with two guys around the same time. One of them was my brother, Johnny.” I swallowed thickly. It wasn’t my place to name Justin as the other guy. All these secrets were taking a toll on me. Sharing some of it helped a little.
“Oh, honey.” She hugged me. “I’m so sorry.”
