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"But what if I'm falling in love with you?" he said. "What if you're breaking my heart by not even giving me a shot at yours?"
16
THE DOUBLE TAKE that Eva did was epic Three Stooges. "What? Breakingyourheart?"
He merely looked at her, trying to convey his seriousness.
"Don't tease me about this, Jake."
Guess it hadn't worked. "I'm not. I feel different about you than I have any other girl. It's crazy, but I think I am falling in love with you."
If he hadn't been so shocked by his own admission, he might have teased her to lighten the mood. But saying "I think I'm falling in love with you" wasn't something to laugh about. Especially for a guy like him, a guy who'd claimed to be allergic to commitment.
Not that this was a commitment. More like a forecast for the big L.
Eva had always been like family. He was devoted to her, and he knew she would always be there for him. But as those words had tumbled from his mouth, the truth became reality.
This thing he felt was incredibly alive inside him, uncurling and opening itself to possibility. This wasn't about sex-though he was primed and ready if that moment should arrive- but about something scary, strange, and wonderful.
Had to be love, right?
Jake looked at her now. At the way the setting sun bathed her bared shoulders in a golden light. At the yearning on her face. At those cinnamon-brown eyes mirroring the shock she no doubt felt at his declaration. And it was as if he truly saw her for the first time. His Eva.
"Wait. Say it again," she said, her gaze meeting his.
"I think I'm falling for you?"
She narrowed her eyes. He knew she was wondering if this was all a ploy to get in her pants.
"E, this isn't about sex. I know you think it is. I'm talking about something totally different. I'm talking about love."
"Love?"
"Gotta be. I can't stop thinking about you."
"I'm pretty sure that's not love."
"No, I've never felt this way, like I might shrivel up and die if you dismiss this thing between us as only physical."
She swallowed, twisting the fingers that clasped her knees almost frantically. He could see she was trying to hold her emotions together. "Jake, I told you no, and that's just something you don't hear too often from a woman."
"Bullshit," he said, tugging her arms, making her hands come undone. He took her hand, cradling it, turning it over. Her hands were strong with unpolished, short nails. These weren't the hands of a woman scared of anything. So why was she so afraid to try something more with him? "I'm willing to take the risk. I'm rolling the dice on the chance we could be something more. For once in my life I'm not running from the messy stuff, I'm not hiding from the emotion inside me, but you are. Why are you so scared to trust me?”
She ripped her hand from his. "I trust you, Jake, I do. But not with this. I've wanted you for so long, and I should be jumping into your arms. But I'm scared to let you love me. I've seen girls just like me think they can grab hold of you. They couldn't. So in this I'm being practical."
"Practical sucks, E." Jake spun his legs around so he faced Eva, and then he leaned over, setting one hand on either side of her. She dropped her knees as he leaned in close. When they were almost nose to nose he said, "Tell me you don't love me."
Her eyes welled with sudden tears. "Don't do this to me, Jake. Please."
"No. Tell me. Tell me you don't love me. Tell me to leave you the hell alone."
"Stop."
"Just be Eva. Be honest."
Swallowing hard, she stared into the depths of his gaze. Her pretty eyes shimmered with longing, with something so absolutely sweet his heart tightened. "I want you to leave…Oh, please don't do this to me, Jake."
"Why? My Eva isn't afraid of anything. She charges in, she doesn't back down. She's not afraid of risk. Not even a broken heart."
