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“About what?” I slipped my cell back into my pocket.
“Oh, don’t act all innocent. You know exactly what I mean.”
“Shh.” I looked around. The guys were goofing around on the track while Lilly and I sat huddled in one of the bumper cars.
“They’re busy doing whatever it is guys do. You and Evan Porter, huh?”
I groaned. She wasn’t going to let this drop. Not now that she had me alone. “It’s…”
“It looked pretty serious from where I was standing.”
“What were you even doing in the library?”
“You do know libraries house all the books, right?”
“It’s usually empty.”
“I bet it is.” Lilly smirked. “So are you two like just hooking up or is it something more?”
Leaning my head back against the car’s pole, I let out a sigh. “Honestly, I don’t know. Evan is…”
“Complicated? Mysterious? Brooding? Drop-dead gorgeous in that misunderstood bad boy kind of way?”
I smiled. Lilly wasn’t wrong, Evan was all of those things. But he was also loyal, caring, and protective, and he’d let me into his life. Maybe not completely willingly, but I was there now. And I didn’t want to leave.
But something felt wrong about this. Sure, Evan and I weren’t one of those couples who talked all day long, but after seeing his mom firsthand on Saturday, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right.
“You’ve got it bad.” Lilly whistled through her teeth. “I can see it in your eyes. Jay and I were like that in the beginning. It was all intense and consuming. Like a whirlwind. But it petered out after a few months.”
I shot her an incredulous look. “You mean you guys were worse than you are now?”
“Hey. We’re not that bad.”
“Whatever you say, Lil, whatever you say.”
“Have you, you know…?”
“What? God, no.”
“Don’t sound so surprised. It’s not like we’re kids, Becca.”
“Yeah, I know, but it’s… it’s not like that with us.”
Who was I kidding? It was completely like that. I’d offered myself to Evan more than once already, and he’d pulled away as many times. We were a hot mess when it came tothat. The push and pull. The should we, shouldn’t we.
“He’s a guy, you’re a girl. It’s always like that.”
Was she right? My sexual experience amounted to one bad decision. The biggest regret of my life. I wanted Evan, there was no doubt about that, but it was more than just physical attraction with us. We shared something deeper. I couldn't explain it, but I felt it.
“What’s up, sexy ladies?” Vin’s voice boomed across the bumper car track, shaking all thoughts of Evan right out of my head.
“Jesus Vin, real nice.”
“Lighten up, man, they know I’m only joking. Right girls?”
Lilly scoffed, shaking her head. “How you ever get a date is beyond me.”
“Your words cut deep, Lil.” Vin clutched his heart and gasped. “This shit’s boring tonight, so I might go and see who else is around. Maybe I’ll get lucky.” He waggled his eyebrows as he jammed his hands into his pockets and headed off.
