Page 95 of Wolf Outcasted


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“Five minutes,” I hissed while pointing at him, and all he did was smirk and crack his neck like he’d started a mental timer.

“Five minutes.”

“I’m not ready yet, Dimitris.” I was pleading with him. “I can’t. No…like…you have to understand. I know you understand me. I’ve never felt worthy of being in a pack, let alone enjoyed being in an actual pack that wants me! A pack that isn’t beating me every night and torturing me at every fucking corner. A pack that actually makes me feel safe instead of feeling like I have to fight for my life at every corner on pack property. T-There’s too much going on and I can’t handle it. There’s no way I can be Alpha of seven men before being bonded with Loki which may technically mean he’s joining the pack. I don’t fucking know. Dimitris…I…there’s no way.”

It was too much. There was no way I could handle it.

I probably looked fucking hopeless but I was being a hundred percent truthful about this.

I’m not ready…

He moved and reached out to soothingly stroke my head.

“Breathe, Willow.”

Fuck. I’d already forgotten to do that.

“A year from now,” he calmly whispered. “I told her you’re not ready to run the pack yet. Not because you don’t have the capability to do so, because you most certainly do, but with two recent new additions and a potential third, it’s too dangerous to shift the pack into your control,” he explained.

My heart already began to calm down as the “year from now” statement echoed in my mind.

A year. I have a year. Thank goodness.

Then I felt dreadful.

“She probably thinks I’m weak then,” I muttered and avoided his gaze.

“No,” he began and moved his hand once more to grasp my chin and force my eyes to return to his. “She understands the dangers of transferring an extremely powerful pack of damaged fuckers like us. Another problem is that your mind isn’t stable, and it’s only going to escalate with these withdrawal symptoms from stopping the medication the Coven has been making for you since you were a child.”

I was sure he was referring to it as the “medication the Coven created” when it was obvious Aurelia had been in charge of my meds the whole while. Maybe he didn’t want to paint my best friend’s image in a negative light on my behalf.

Something Dimitris would secretly do.

“Which is why I emphasized that I needed a pill that did it all and protected your sanity.”

“Hold on,” I whispered as I finally realized something. “You went all the way to using your status…something you’ve probably not used for yourself…to meet with my mom and use the royal resources in my family's name to force them to make something promptly to stabilize my health…all because I was in pain last night?”

It finally fucking clicked, and the way his cheeks began to flush proved it.

He struggled to not look away before he muttered, “I can’t afford you spiraling a third time, Willow.”

Spiraling into another suicide attempt.

Spiraling into another episode, feeling like the world’s caving.

Spiraling into the clutches of my enemies’ mockery.

Spiraling into my own madness…

“Why…why…” This man was going to make me an emotional mess all over again. “Dimitris.”

“You’re one of us now.” The words were heavy as his eyes darkened with a hint of compassion. “When you bleed, we bleed. When you’re in pain, it hurts all of us. No matter the disagreements or the days where we stubbornly argue due to our competitiveness, at the end of the day, you’re ours now and no one else is going to try to steal you away. Not the Vile Queen. Not the Coven. Not even yourself. Understand?”

“But…Neo said…”

“That you’re stopping all your meds, yes,” he emphasized. “Except he didn’t think this option would be possible. I didn’t tell them where I was going or what my plans were. That’s what an Alpha has to do sometimes to get shit done fast and without conflict. Everyone is aware of the pills and their benefits, and they’ve been created just for you. A royally approved aid will come and check in on you, typically one who focuses more on the magic department since your magic is off the charts with the awakening with Viktor versus your wolf side seeing as Bria seems rather content.”

He offered me the pill, and I couldn’t help but admire it up close.

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