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“Why... um, have you only slept with...” I trail off. Saying the word “hooker” would make it real for me.
His look gets even darker. So scary, I’m glad we are having this conversation through a screen and not face to face.
“I’ve only slept with call girls, all of them above the age of twenty-one,” he grits out. “And just so you know, in no way did I force anyone to do anything they didn’t want to, so please stop looking at me like I’m a piece of gum on the bottom of your shoe.”
I dig my fingers into the pillow and do my best to calm down my innerdon’t-mess-with-me womanwho has her fists up, ready to fight.
Any normal human would be on edge after the incredible shit he disclosed. I hope he doesn’t expect me to swallow it without a protest and continue like nothing happened.
I lift my head to the ceiling and while I pray for understanding, I school my features into a stoic mask. When I look at him, I speak softly in an effort to temper the irritation I feel. “I’m not looking at you any kind of way, Royce. I’m just shocked is all. You have to give me a moment to process things.”
He scrubs a hand down his face, and like a magic trick, his expression morphs from angry to contrite. “I know, Sin. I’m just... with you.” He puffs out a harsh breath. “Never have I cared a fuck what people thought of me. You’ve changed that. I always want you to hold me in high regard... and... well, I guess I’m... damn this is hard to admit... I’m ashamed.”
“Royce, there is no need for you to feel that way. What I can’t understand is why you pay for sex when women must throw their pussies in your face.” Even before I finish my sentence, he breaks out laughing.
I fail to see what’s funny until he wheezes outpussies in my facebetween guffaws. Finally, I see the humor and I laugh too. Before long, we are egging each other on with the depth of our amusement.
When our laughter dies down and we’ve wiped away the tears our mirth let loose, I find Royce looking at me with a tender expression that both warms my heart and cools down any remnants of anger.
“Sin, I can hardly wait to hear you laugh every day.”
My heart should flip like a dolphin doing tricks. It can’t. Not when I have so many reservations.
Yeah, I’ve thought about him every day for two years, and no, I don’t doubt we have unfailing chemistry.
But does “hot and heavy sex” a long-lasting relationship make?
What if he doesn’t like the way I brush my teeth?
He saw me do that when I stayed with him last week.
Well, what if he is messy?
No, he isn’t.
The week that we were together, Royce never left a scrap of clothing on the floor, and when we ordered room service, he had them pick up the dishes right away. Also, after we’d eaten dinner at my apartment, he cleaned up better than I ever have.
And that is saying something from a neat freak like me.
“You look far away. Talk to me, Sin. Is this too much? Am I too much?”
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I’m just thinking. Wishing you were here.”
If he were, my misgivings would float away like a wispy cloud in a strong wind. He’s not though. He’s in New York. In a place and station of life I’m far removed from.
Undeniable
Royce
Iwanttobuywhat she is selling. I can’t. Her eyes don’t quite agree with her smile. “You’re worried, aren’t you? Tell me the truth.”
Her sigh travels through the phone and rests in my heart. “Yes, I am. There are so many questions...” she lifts her gaze once more to the ceiling as if it will provide her concrete answers.
It won’t. I’m the only one capable of doing that.
“List them. One by one. Don’t hold anything back.”
Sin levels her gaze at me, her eyes intense and scrutinizing, ready to spot a lie the moment it comes out of my mouth.
