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“Yes, I was assigned female at birth, but I’m a man.”
“And you don’t have a dick?”
“I do, but I opted against bottom surgery, so not in the traditional sense.”
I rub a hand over my jaw and roll my lips between my teeth, trying to envision it.
I run my tongue over my teeth. “I kinda want to see that.”
“Oh Jesus,” Elliot mutters, opening the driver’s side door. “You are insane. Certifiable. You should be committed. I have to go.”
I rush toward him. “But wait, I get another question. You said I get two.” I hold up a finger, and then another. “One, two. I can count.”
“No. Teaching time is over. You’re on your own now. It wasnotso nice to meet you, Luke. Goodbye.”
I move to stop him, but he’s locked the door and is already backing out of the parking space, running over my foot in the process.
“Fuck,” I say, staring down at my throbbing toes.
But they don’t matter, not really, because Elliot left me hanging. What the hell? Just when I finally go and meet someone interesting, they drive over my foot and leave me. He could have broken my toes for all he knows.
Hm, well, joke’s on him. I’m a pro at online sleuthing. How many doctors named Elliot can there possibly be in this city?
I’ll find him eventually.
Just give me a few days.
* * *
“I’m here to see Dr. Madden,” I say, leaning over the small counter and grinning at the receptionist. She has pink hair and purple lipstick and looks like an anime character.Amanda, her nametag reads.
“Do you have an appointment?” she asks dryly, arching one bushy, sculpted eyebrow at me. It’s impressive, really. It seems to have a mind of its own; I think it even scowls at me.
“Pfft, of course I do, Amanda. I made all the appointments.”
I try to charm her with my eyes, but she just stares at me blankly. I sniff and then gesture to the bandage on my face. “He did this to me, busted my head right open. And then he ran over my foot with his car. He felt like shit about it, too. Told me to show up here so he could make sure I was feeling better. And hell, it hurts like a bitch. Could be broken. Could possibly fall off. It’s starting to smell like cheese and not the good kind. Dr. Google told me I have gangrene.”
She looks bored and unconvinced as she blows a large bubble with her pink gum. It pops loudly and she sucks the pieces back into her mouth, nodding to the seating area in front of her. “Take a seat, crazy.”
I knew I could win her over. She’s putty in my hands.
I lower myself into the chair next to an older, balding man and lean in close, eyeballing his4-Wheelmagazine over his shoulder. He side-eyes me and then scoots three chairs over.
Asshole. No one likes to share anymore.
I glance up and see the anime receptionist watching me. She pops another bubble and then arches her other eyebrow at me. I’m convinced they’re not actually attached to her face.
Two can play this game.
I waggle mine at her.
She crosses her eyes.
I stick out my tongue and fold it in half.
Fuck, I could do this all day. I have all sorts of tricks up my sleeve.
Two minutes later, I see Elliot enter the waiting room, his eyes narrowing as he takes me in. He’s wearing fitted grey slacks, a tucked-in blue button-up, and a white lab coat. His hair is impeccably combed to the side, and his trendy glasses sit perched on his nose as he blinks at me in irritation.
