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Chapter 6
Kincaid~
If things kept going this way, I feared coffee wasn’t going to be enough anymore. I had no desire to jump on the cocaine train, but these late nights were beginning to catch up with me.
Even though Saxton had stayed with me for two hours on the phone last night, I still hadn’t been able to sleep. Thoughts of Fox had tortured me all night, and I couldn’t understand why. I’d been doing a great job of pretending like I didn’t have feelings for him for three years, so I had no idea why it was becoming such a struggle now.
I’d had a choice to make three years ago, and I’d made it. I’d been okay with it. I had kept my eyes on the prize and had kept moving forward.
So, what was the problem now?
When I’d first met Fox, it hadn’t been my finest moment. I’d been wrestling with a gas pump for eons, and the misogynistic cashier had implied that it hadn’t been the pump, but my feminine inability to work the gas nozzle.
The prick.
The attitude in me had been unleashed, and Fox had stepped in to try to salvage the situation. When the gas nozzle hadn’t worked for him either, we’d taken on the cashier together. In our mutual quest to take down the convenient store cashier, we had hit it off, and we’d gone to dinner.
For three hours, we’d spoken about everything under the sun. While I’d kept a lot of my personal skeletons locked safely in the closet, we had spoken about everything else. My brother and Saxton had been the only two topics that we hadn’t touched on. It had felt…different.
He had felt different.
So different, in fact, that I had given him my virginity that night. Only four months shy of my nineteenth birthday, Fox had been the first guy who had ever inspired that kind of passion from me, and it’d been a no-brainer. I had given myself up to everything that Fox had made me feel that night, and it was still the best night of my life.
After that night, it’d been as if Fox had hit a slut switch inside of me. I couldn’t get enough of him, and I let the guy do things that no respectable girl would ever allow. A day hadn’t gone by where we hadn’t been together. No sex act had been off-limits, and we’d even done things in public. My sexual appetite for him could never be satisfied. Just one touch had the power to set my entire soul afire, and my need for him had been a weakness that hadn’t frightened me.
There was also the fact that the boy had broken me in with a cock that was close to nine inches. It had been brutally painful, but beautiful. Every time with him had been passionately beautiful. Even when things had gotten rough, there’d been beauty in the intensity in which he’d take me.
Fox Harrington had been my first serious boyfriend. While I’d kiss other guy, and had even let them get some boob action, Fox had been gifted everything else. There hadn’t been a thing that he hadn’t done. In fact, even my period hadn’t been enough to curb the need for each other. That’s how insane we’d been for each other.
And now?
We could barely stand to be around each other.
Of course, it was all my fault, and I could own that. Again, I’d had a choice to make, and I’d made it. As difficult and as heartbreaking as it’d been, I’d done it. While my brother’s death had been the hardest thing I’d ever gone through, breaking up with Fox had been the hardest things that I’d ever done.
It had all come down to one phone call from Saxton.
Just one call.
Saxton had called me earlier that day to tell me that he was going to officially choose me for his supporter the next day. They’d been given their instructions, and there’d been no reason to wait on announcing his pick. However, that hadn’t been the only thing he’d informed me of. Saxton had also given me the list of names that had been picked along with his.
Fox Harrington had been on that list.
When my naivety had hit me, it had hit me hard. Of course, Fox Harrington would be on that list. Why wouldn’t he be? He was goddamn Fox Harrington. The other names hadn’t surprised me, either. The cast of characters had been everything you’d think of when you thought of The Order, and Fox had been no exception.
Fox fucking Harrington.
Tossing the empty coffee cup in the trashcan, I immediately popped the lid off my second cup. Not wanting to wait in line for the second cup of coffee that I knew I was going to need, I had purchased two at the same time, no shame in my game.
Glancing at my watch, I had fifteen more minutes to let the coffee kick in and get me through the first half of my day. As far as I knew, nothing was going on tonight that I needed to be a part of, so if I could just get through the day, I could sleep the rest of this depressing Thursday away.
Just then, my phone chimed with an incoming text. Glancing at it, I couldn’t help but smile.
SaxyV: Just checking on u
Me: I’m fine
SaxyV: Ur lying
