AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I sweep hair away from her face and touch my lips to hers. When more tears trickle down her skin, I kiss away the drops and drag my fingers down her cheeks. "Why are you crying, love?"
She rubs away the tears, hauls in a deep breath, and clears her throat. "It's nothing."
My jaw clenches. Nothing? That's bollocks, and we both know it. But since I refuse to share my feelings with her, I can't push her to confess.
She feigns a laugh. "Guess you're such a great lover, I cry from the pure ecstasy of it."
My frown tenses my whole face. "You aren't going to tell me, are you?"
"No."
I roll off her, flopping onto my back. "You can't keep crying and not tell me why."
"You don't want to know."
"Stop saying that." I jump off the bed and scoop her up in my arms, then I shove the covers aside with my foot and drop her back onto the mattress. She squeaks, bouncing a little. I leap over her body to lie down alongside her, tugging the covers over us both, and pull her against me with our chests crushed together. "I'll be holding you until you tell me the truth."
"Oh, darn."
My lips twitch but don't quite form a smile. "If we're not talking, then go to sleep, woman."
"Woman?" She tries to kick me but can't get leverage. "I'm not your chattel."
"I know. I have no claim on you."
"Do you want to? Have a claim, I mean."
Aye, I want it so much I can't breathe when I think about leaving her. But I'm incapable of giving her what she really needs. "Go to sleep."
She flattens her lips, but then rolls over, turning her back to me.
I pull her close again, my front to her back.
Erica holds still for a moment before she relaxes into me. We snuggle under the sheets, my hand over her belly while the heat of her permeates my entire body. I listen to her breathing as it slows and becomes shallower, a sign she's falling asleep. My breaths come slower too as I let my muscles slacken, allowing myself a few moments to revel in the feel of her body tucked against mine. The world sifts away, and I relax even more deeply.
"Stay with you forever."
Did I mumble those words or only think them? Doesn't matter.
I can't stay, but for tonight, I will pretend I can.
Chapter Twenty-Five
The sun has sunk below the horizon by the time we turn onto the street where we both live—or rather, where she lives and where I'm temporarily in residence. The mood on the drive back from the bed-and-breakfast had been tense and melancholy, on both our parts. We'd spent two more nights at the quaint mansion and visited more tourist attractions in the vicinity during the day, but always I sensed tension beneath the surface. We're both pretending I didn't make love to her like she means more to me than a fling. If Erica heard what I think I mumbled on that first night while I was falling asleep, she hasn't given any indication that she did. Maybe she wishes she hadn't heard me say that. Either way, the distance between us has grown to more than the width of the center console in the Mercedes.
I want to touch her, kiss her, convince her to share her troubles with me. But it's a bloody awful idea. If I know everything about Erica, I won't want to leave her. It's possible I already feel that way, but that changes nothing.
Maybe I shouldn't have worshiped her body on that first night, but I couldn't stop myself. Knowing I will leave soon infected me with a growing sense of dread, and I needed to show her how much I cherish her. But I can't stay. I would only hurt her more if I tried to make this work between us.
Until the day I go home, I will spend every moment I can with her.
Earlier today, I received a text from Rory informing me of Aisley's new demand. She wants everything I have including my Edinburgh apartment and my house in the Highlands. When I'd read that message, I wanted to pound my fists on…anything. But I'd been in the bathroom of our room at the bed-and-breakfast, so instead, I had raged on the inside while I took a shower. Even pummeling my body with steaming-hot water hadn't helped, and neither had cold water.
That's why I hadn't said much during our drive home. I still don't understand Erica's reticence, though.
I pull the car into the driveway of Gil's house and get out to open Erica's door for her. "You must be jeeked. I'll bring your bags over to your house after I drop mine off. Then I'll make you a good meal. All right?"
She nods weakly, and I swear her lips tremble a touch.
