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"You mean to save me." I'm slightly dismayed by how resigned I sound.
"I'm not trying to save you, unless you want me to. I told you before, I love a challenge and I love an adventure. You are both."
"I see." While I mull my options, I survey the room to avoid meeting my wife's gaze. "May I ask a personal question?"
"Ask me anything you like." She holds up one finger. "Be warned, though. It goes both ways."
"Fine." I relax into my chair, one ankle lodged on the opposite knee. "You mentioned a fiancé. Why did you call off the wedding?"
"I didn't call off the wedding. I ended the engagement." Straightening, she dances her fingers over the computer keyboard near her hip. "Luke and I were together for three years before he proposed, and I took six days to give him an answer. Two weeks after I said yes, I realized if we'd really loved each other, we would've tied the knot a long time ago. So, I broke up with Luke. He wasn't devastated."
"He let you go without a fight?"
"Yep." She bends one knee, tucking her foot under the other leg. "I told him I couldn't marry him, and he shrugged. Literally. He shrugged and walked away. Moved his stuff out of our apartment the same day. Six months later, he's living with a woman who owns a pot shop."
"Ceramics?" I have no idea if she realizes I'm teasing her. But I suspect she does. Emery is a clever woman.
"Marijuana," she says. "It's legal in Colorado."
I rise from my chair and angle over the desk toward her. "You haven't said if you were upset when you ended your engagement."
"I wasn't. Relieved would be the best description."
"Why would you stay so long with a man who cared so little about you?"
"Luke and I had been friends since college," she says. "Four years ago, I started dating somebody I thought was a nice guy. We got along, and Sebastian was game for any silly thing I wanted to do. Gradually, he became more and more withdrawn, even lost interest in sex. He blamed work stress. About eight months into our relationship, I ran into one of his coworkers. He told me Sebastian had been fired six weeks earlier, for watching internet porn at work."
Though I want to touch her, to comfort her, I don't do it. That would be inappropriate, considering our arrangement.
She scratches her arm. "When I confronted him, Sebastian admitted he'd been lying to me about a lot of things, not just being fired. Instead of looking for a new job, he'd spent eighteen hours a day watching porn on two dozen different websites. He didn't want to sleep with me because reality couldn't compare to his fantasy women. He liked jerking off while watching them more than he cared about me. I begged him to get help."
"What did he say?" I ask gently.
"Flat-out no." She wraps her arms around herself. "I had no choice. I broke up with him."
I walk around the desk to sit on its edge facing her and settle a hand on her knee. "This is where revenge porn comes into the story."
She nods, though she won't look at me. "Six months earlier, Sebastian talked me into posing for nude photos. He swore they'd be for his eyes only, and I was kind of flattered he'd ask. What an idiot, huh?"
"No, Emery, you are not an idiot."
"I trusted him, and he turned out to be a damn liar." She swipes at the tears gathering in her eyes. "He posted the photos on social media. I told you before, I got them taken down. For all I know, some other sleazebag might've copied them."
She's locked her hands around her upper arms.
I tug them free and slide closer to clasp her hands on her lap. "How does this relate to your engagement?"
"When the shit exploded in my face, Luke was there to support me." She takes three slow breaths. "My family was far away, and I was ashamed to tell them what happened. Luke convinced me I needed to. He sat beside me, holding my hand, when I called my parents. He helped me figure out how to get the photos taken down. I was so grateful to him, I guess I mistook gratitude for love. Three months after the photo fiasco, I moved in with Luke."
"You stayed with him for three years."
"Because it was easy." She inhales another deep breath. "I swore I'd never let Sebastian's actions affect my future, but I guess they did. I got into this rut with my life. Boring, dead-end job. Boring, dead-end boyfriend. Standing still was easier and safer than uprooting my whole life. Computer programming wasn't my life's passion, and neither was Luke. Both looked good on paper, but all of it stifled me more than I realized until I got laid off and had to reexamine my choices."
"That's why you married me."
"Kind of." She lifts her face to gaze at me. "You are not boring, that's for sure."
I absently draw circles on the desk with my finger. "What's the full name of the scunner who shamed you?"
