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Yet the moment that he did, he breathed a sigh of relief as the sound came once again. Now, standing close to it, Watson could see that it was the twisted branch of a nearby tree scraping against the windowpane in the wind.
"It looks like there may be a storm coming," he commented with a deep sigh.I ought to have the gardener trim the tree back so it does not happen again,he thought grimly even as he turned back to Miss Percival, half hoping that they could go right back to what they had been doing before they were so rudely interrupted.
The moment that he saw her, he knew that his hopes would be dashed to the window. The governess was up on her feet, her cheeks blushing bright red even as she pulled her shawl tighter around herself, clearly trying to hide herself from view. Though her skirts were covering them, Watson had the feeling that if he looked beneath, her legs would be tightly crossed and barring any chance he might have had left of having his way with her.
That is not what I want!he snapped at himself angrily though deep down he knew that was exactly where things had been going. Correcting himself, he thought,That is not all that I want.
Chapter 13
What is wrong with me?Matilda asked herself over and over all night and throughout the next day as she realised she could not stop thinking of what had happened with the Duke in his library. She could not for the life of her stop thinking of how amazing it had been to kiss him, how it had felt to have his hand brushing against her thigh. Whenever she thought about it heat pooled between her legs and she was forced to clench them together.
It was even worse in his presence at dinner that evening though luckily Lady Amy seemed on top form and she managed to keep most of the conversation going so that Matilda would not have to. It was bad enough having to face the Duke after what had happened. She did not dare to think of what might happen if Lady Amy started to pick up on the tension between them.
The Duke himself seemed all too pleased to keep the conversation going with his daughter and for the most part, Matilda remained silent, only really speaking when spoken to. Several times she felt the Duke raise his eyebrow at her or offer her a look of concern, but she could not bring herself to look him in the eye.
By the time that dinner was drawing to an end, Matilda was hopeful that she might avoid her usual meeting with the Duke in his library. After all, he had usually mentioned it long before now. Yet as Helen arrived to guide Lady Amy to bed, he said good night to his daughter and then turned to her and said, “Miss Percival, please, meet me in the library.”
The tone of his voice was deeper than usual, and it caused Matilda’s chest to tighten and her heart to clench. His gaze seemed darker than usual also, making her feel more than a little uncomfortable, though it was mainly because she wanted so desperately to continue looking into his eyes even though she knew she should not look at him at all.
“Your Grace, I was rather hoping that…” she began, trying to come up with some excuse not to meet him in the library. She thought of telling him that she had a headache or maybe even that there were extra chores she had to attend to before she could retire to her bed. Yet the excuses all dissolved on her tongue as he looked at her with a pointed expression.
“I shall meet you there in a moment,” he told her firmly even as Helen and Lady Amy retired from the room. The lady’s maid glanced over her shoulder as she went, giving Matilda a suspicious and concerned look before she followed her charge out and up the staircase.
“Of course, Your Grace,” Matilda responded with a nod before she pushed herself to her feet and began to walk with shaking legs toward the dining room door. She was sure that she could feel his gaze upon her as she walked away but she could not bring herself to look back for fear that she might lose herself in his gaze once more.
Walking carefully down the hall to the library, she tried her hardest to get a grip on herself. Yet when she stepped into the room, she found that her knees were still trembling, and her palms had grown slick with sweat. She could only imagine how she might react when the Duke finally joined her.
Feeling weak at the thought of being alone with him again, Matilda crossed to the couch and sat down, waiting impatiently for his arrival with her legs still trembling at the knees beneath her skirts.
She was only alone for a few minutes before she heard the familiar sound of the Duke’s footsteps coming down the hall. Listening closely, she tried to hear for the sound of other footsteps, wondering whether the Duke might wish to avoid another incident like the night before. Perhaps he had brought Burns or even Quintin along with him?
Yet when he entered the room, the Duke was alone. He smiled warmly at Matilda even as he kicked the door closed behind him and Matilda struggled to swallow past the sudden lump in her throat. Though she had always found the Duke handsome, he was even more so tonight. The light from the fireplace warmed his sun kissed skin and caused his glossy black hair to shine.
“Your Grace,” Matilda greeted him, jumping to her feet with the need to curtsy, reminding herself once again that she was his employee and she had to remember her place. “I feel I must apologise once again.”
The Duke who had been moving around the room to come and stand with her paused just shy of being able to touch her. He looked at her with a raised eyebrow and shook his head even as he asked, “What could you possibly have to apologise for?”
Gulping past the growing lump in her throat, Matilda forced herself to meet the Duke’s gaze as she responded, “For my actions last night.”
The Duke’s gaze darkened, and he shook his head at her words. He surprised her most of all when he stepped forward and gripped hold of her shoulders. “Matilda, you have nothing at all to apologise for.”
Heart racing, Matilda found that she could not take her gaze from his. Her mouth seemed to go entirely dry and when she opened her lips to try to speak, she found she had no idea of what to say.
“It is I who should apologise to you, Matilda,” the Duke continued with a deep and seemingly aggravated sigh. “For I cannot stop thinking of you.”
Matilda’s heart skipped a beat at that. She opened her mouth to tell him that she felt the same way but then quickly clamped her jaws shut again. To admit something like that out loud would be like throwing herself down the rabbit hole and she was not entirely sure she was ready for that.
I am a governess!she reminded herself, wondering how she had ever allowed herself to get into such a situation. Never in her life had she allowed herself to get so close to an employer and yet here she was with his hands on her shoulders, wishing that he would touch her in so many other places.
All the will to reject the idea of being close to him evaporated the moment that the Duke lifted a hand to stroke a stray strand of hair away from her cheek. He cupped her face in both his hands then and tilted her head up slightly so that she was forced to look him in the eye.
“Matilda, I believe you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes upon,” he said, his voice barely more than a whisper, almost as if the words were the very air that he breathed. And it was those words that made Matilda weak at the knees once more. Heart hammering, she found herself pushing up on her tiptoes, pouting her lips instinctively even as she felt him leaning down to her.
It was right in that moment, just as she thought he was about to kiss her, that he paused and whispered against her lips, “Matilda, I cannot fight whatever this is between us any longer.”
A shiver ran throughout Matilda’s body, and she had to press the palms of her hands against his chest in order to stop herself from falling. Even as she did so, she felt as if she were melting into him, losing herself in the warmth and strength of his body.
Suddenly, she felt as though he were the only thing holding her up and that if he let go, she might simply float away to nothingness. It was a thought that made her heart ache and she longed never to experience it, pressing herself ever closer to him.
