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“Something does,” she mumbles, flicking her gaze toward my groin several times as we make our way to our shared room. My cock’s hard and definitely not hiding its eagerness any longer.
“You getting scared of me?”
I won’t make her do anything she doesn’t want to. I hope she realizes that. I think she’s freaking out inside now that we’re alone in a hotel together and we’ve both made it clear that we don’t intend to hold back from taking her body any longer. Glancing at my groin, it’s clear as day, I want to fuck her until she can’t stand up.
“No, but...” She trails off, and eventually, I glance her way. She continues, “Do you think I’m a ho?”
Anger claws its way up my back with her question. Did someone call her one? Where did she get that shit from? Nobody, and I mean not a motherfucking soul, better have called her a ho. I’ll have Saint wearing their skin like a goddamn cape in retribution.
“No. Who the fuck said that?” The words are harsh to my own ears as they leave my mouth. I can only imagine how she’ll take it, but hearing her even question it, has me furious. Jude’s one of the purest individuals I’ve ever come across.
“Uh...no one, but I know people will think it’s wrong.”
“Think what’s wrong? Baby, spell the shit out for me. I’m a man, remember?”
“That it’s wrong for me to want you both, at the same time.”
“Well, too fucking bad. You know why, Jude?” I ask, and she shakes her head, looking to me for guidance.
“Because I said so, that’s why. Besides, ain’t nobody looking in that mirror each day besides you. If you’re happy and satisfied, then fuck what anyone else has to say. You think me and Saint would be where we are if we gave two shits about what anyone else thought?”
“No.”
“Exactly. You have to live for yourself. And if anyone does have enough guts to call you that, you let Saint and me know. We’ll squash that shit right away. They’ll be lucky if they can ever speak again. Never let what you assume people may think rule your life. It’s not worth it.”
She nods, keeping her thoughts to herself. Hopefully, she hears me and listens about this. It’s too important that she doesn’t feel guilty for what makes her happy. She deserves to enjoy life, just as everyone else in the world does.
We get inside the room and Jude’s uncharacteristically quiet, especially after our serious chat in the hallway and elevator.
“Talk to me, Jude,” I half-ask-half-demand, as I sit on the bed beside her, fighting myself to keep from touching her everywhere.
Saint’s still in the bathroom, sink water on. I suppose brushing his teeth or shaving. Fucking pretty boy.
“I wanted to ask you something.”
“Shoot.”
She draws in a deep breath. Whatever she’s thinking, must be serious. “Do you kill people like Saint?” She asks it so innocuously.
It has me swallowing, as my throat’s grown a bit tighter than usual. Fucking shit. I wasn’t expecting her to ask that, of all things.
I stall, racking my brain for what the hell I should say. How truthful should I be with her? “What the...I mean, where’s this coming from?”
She shrugs. “I just want to know you.”
“Yeah, you sure about that, sweetheart? You might not like what you find out. Especially asking questions like that one in particular,” I reply, tucking her hair behind her ear. I like being able to see her whole face when I talk to her. She’s too beautiful not to look at as much as possible.
“So far, you don’t seem so bad.”
I shoot her a mock glare, and she grins. She’s straight fucking perfection, even with the smattering of light freckles over her nose. I think they make her even more stunning, if possible. How did I not notice it sooner? I don’t know how I was able to hold back from her for this long.
“Thanks, I think, anyway. You want the truth?”
“Yes, please.”
Picking up her hand, I cover it with both of mine needing to make sure she doesn’t take off running and screaming. With a sigh, I admit one of my worst sins. “Yes, if necessary, I will.” I have many sins, but I don’t want her knowing them all.
She swallows, so silent; the air thickens as I wait for her to say something—anything. Even that she hates me, just say something and put me on the chopping block already. I’m not sure what to think, and I hate that feeling.
