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Abruptly, Aggie pulled away. She was breathing heavily, her blue eyes full of indecision. “Stop, please, this isn’t fair. I don’t want to see you again.”
“Now who’s lying?” he asked harshly. “You want to punish me? Fine, I deserve it. I hurt you badly, betrayed your trust, you do what you need to do, but don’t lie to me. You don’t want me to go, you just kissed me, you know it’s not over between us.”
“I'm not trying to hurt you, I just can't think straight when you're here.” Big, fat, round tears began to chase each other down her cheeks. “I admit that I don’t want it to be over, I want there to be a way to fix things, but there isn’t, and you constantly coming here isn’t going to change that. I want …”
“What do youwant, Aggie? Stop thinking with your head, that isn’t you, you think with your heart.” He pressed a hand to her chest where he could feel her heart beating wildly. “What does yourheartwant?” He caught her gaze, held it.
Her eyes seemed to grow bluer as he stared into them. He could see so many emotions swirling inside her. She wanted to forgive him, he knew she did, but she was scared, scared that he would hurt her again. He hated that he’d made her doubt him even if she had good reason to. She had said before that even if she could forgive him, she didn’t know that she could trust him, and if she couldn’t trust him, how could they be together? What good was a relationship without trust?
“I want …”
“Everything okay, Aggie?”
They both started at the voice. Andrew Candella stood behind them.
“Aggie?”
“Yeah, I'm okay.” The indecision was gone from her eyes, now they were filled with reproach—with herself for kissing him he guessed—anger, and pain. She had her guard back up, the wall she had built between them fully erected in a mere second.
“You want to let go of my sister?” Andrew took a threatening step toward him.
Nick slowly released Aggie. His hand on her hip drew her closer, his other hand slid over her shoulder and down her arm, memorizing what she felt like in case he didn’t get another chance to touch her. She trembled under his hands, a tiny glimmer of doubt flashing through her eyes. She was second-guessing herself again.
“I think you should go now,” Andrew ordered.
He wasn't going anywhere until Aggie told him to. “Aggie?”
“I think you should go now,” she parroted her brother’s words.
“Okay,” he agreed. He couldn’t get anywhere with Aggie while her brother was here anyway so he may as well leave, come back again later when she was alone. He would have kissed her again, but he thought Andrew might hit him. Not that that would bother him, but it would probably upset Aggie, and he didn’t want to do that to her.
“And, Nick,” Aggie stopped him at the door. “Don’t come back. I mean it. If you really did develop feelings for me then walk away. Every time I see you it hurts. I can't do it. Please. Stay away from me.”
As he walked down the stairs and out of her building, he wasn't sure if he could do it. Even if it was what Aggie wanted. Right now, he couldn’t see a scenario where this ended well for either of them, and he didn’t know how to change that.
* * * * *
11:52 P.M.
“Aggie?”
Lifting her head off the window, she turned to her brother. “Yeah?”
“I thought you were asleep.”
“I can't sleep. My mind is too awake, too busy, it won't shut off.” The best sleep she had had since the attack had been in Nick’s arms, and even that hadn’t been completely restful. Maybe part of her had known that something was off with Nick. That he was too good to be true. That he wasn't real. Too bad she hadn’t learned to trust her instincts. Or even to listen to them.
“That’s why I brought these.” Andrew held up a small bottle.
“I don’t like taking sleeping pills, they really knock me out,” Aggie protested. Both in high school and college she’d had a tendency to obsess over exams, to the point where she stopped sleeping and barely ate, barely did anything but study. One time during her senior year of high school, when she had gone three days straight without sleep, her father had forced her to take a sleeping pill. On the theory that she would do better on her test if she was well rested, she had agreed. The pill had knocked her out for eighteen hours straight, and she had almost missed the exam.
“That’s the idea.” Her brother smiled. “You were attacked. It doesn’t matter that the attack was a fake, the fear you felt was real, and so are your injuries. You haven’t slept properly since it happened, your mind and your body need time to recharge. You need some proper rest, so I am putting my big brother hat firmly on for this one.” He mimed putting a hat on. “Take the pills, get some sleep, you’ll feel better after you’ve slept, things will seem clearer.”
“Maybe you're right,” she agreed. It wasn't like she had to be up for work in the morning. After Nick’s visit she had known that she couldn’t stay in her home any longer, at least for a while. Nick was never going to stop coming around as long as she was there, and she just couldn’t seem to keep it together when she was with him. So she called her work and told them she needed some time off. Then Andrew offered to let her stay at his country cabin by the lake. He’d said that between work and a business venture he was starting he hadn’t had a chance to get up there recently, although he used to spend most weekends there, so she would be able to have the place to herself and enjoy some peace and quiet, so she could think.
“Of course I'm right.” Andrew moved to get out of the car, but she grabbed his arm.
“Andrew, do you think Dad …? I mean, I know I shouldn’t even ask, but …”
