AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Chapter Eighteen
Ethan
Iknew that Riley and I weren’t a couple, but if she hadn’t been by my side during the service, I’m not sure I would have made it. The words the pastor said, the stories people shared, the tears on my father’s face, all dug right down into the very depth of my soul, and it felt like knives were shredding it.
Her hand in mine, her thumb every once in a while brushing the skin, well, that kept me grounded. A few times, my mind drifted from the service, and I’d remember that Riley was carrying my child. Our baby was growing in her belly—not her baby, our baby!
Part of me wanted to stand up and shout for everyone to know, but we needed to talk before I did that. Riley and I had a lot to discuss, and I knew it wouldn’t happen overnight.
As I said my final goodbyes to my mother, I wished that I could have shared the news with at least her. When Riley said she had, I sobbed into her hair. Knowing that my mother knew the secret before even I did somehow felt right. I could not wait to hear the conversation that they shared.
I managed to get through the graveside service, and then we were heading back to the house. The day was an emotional whirlwind, and I was ready to get rid of everyone and drink myself into oblivion.
Actually, that wasn’t what I wanted. What I wanted to do was sit down with Riley and talk. I was heading into the kitchen to see if I could speak to her or at least help when Wes came at me. It got a little wild for a few minutes, and then Riley, being Riley, slammed a dish down on the counter and got everyone’s attention.
Like everyone else in the room, I was a little shocked at her blurting it all out, but hey, we were talking about Riley here.
“Ethan, did you know about this?” Coral asked as she wiped her hands on a towel.
I put my hands up. “I think Riley said it very well. Once we get a chance to talk, we will fill you all in.” I started to turn away and then got in Wes’s face. “And as for my intentions with your sister, I would never leave her high and dry. You know how I feel about her.”
I stalked away and found her walking circles in the backyard.
As I approached her, I looked her over. She didn’t look pregnant, and I still hadn’t figured out how far along she was. “How far along are you?”
“Nine weeks.”
We talked for a few moments, and I felt like an ass. I really had treated her like shit. I had been doing that to protect myself, but in doing that, I had hurt her. I never wanted to hurt Riley. I had been a jealous asshole and had lashed out. I was better than that.
“I’m sorry, Ethan. I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to be what you wanted.”
“The only thing that I wanted was for you to be with me. We were always good together. We’ve been friends forever. We know everything about one another.”
“We are good friends.”
I needed to touch her. I had held back long enough, and I couldn’t do it any longer. “Riley, I have been in love with you since I was sixteen years old. I would do anything for you, including be here with you every single step of the way. I don’t know how you feel about me or about having this baby, but I need you to know that I will help you with anything. I will never leave you alone to deal with this—any of it.”
“Ethan, I know you love me. Right now, I am so confused and scared. I don’t know how I feel about anything, except that I know that I don’t want to do this alone. I want your help with this.”
I knew she didn’t love me, but maybe she would come to do so. Perhaps she already did but was afraid of loving someone. I vowed then that I would wait; I would show her that she needed me, that she loved me more than just as a friend.
“Are you really carrying my child, Riley?”
“Yes, Ethan, I am.”
Finally, excitement exploded through me, and I lifted her in the air and twirled her around. “I’m gonna be a pretty damn good dad.”
“That’s what your mother said. She said that you would be a wonderful father.”
I put her feet down and closed my eyes as her words settled over me. “Will you come over tonight so we can talk? I have a million questions, or I can come to you.”
“Yeah, I think that it’s time we talk.”
Since Riley didn’t have a car here, I told her I would take her home. The two of us walked back into the house, arm in arm. After a few glares from her brothers, I kissed her forehead and left the room. Riley was right; it was our business, and after we figured things out, we would let them know.
By the time the last friend left, every single one of us was exhausted. In fact, Riley was up in my room napping, and I slipped into the room without disturbing her. She was curled on her side, her hands tucked under her chin. I lifted a curl and wrapped it around my finger, and she shifted.
She opened her eyes after I squatted down. “Hey, sleepyhead.”
