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"When are you going to put it out?" Lucy asked.
"Oh, you mean release it? I haven’t decided," Alec answered. "Ozzy made videos, but I don't know what I'm going to do with them yet. Publicity-wise it's kind of tricky."
"What's tricky about it?" Mac asked.
"I've got a whole thing going with the band, so I'd have to talk to David about it. And second, uh, uhhhhh," he let out a defeated sigh, searching for the right words. "Also, I don't really have any right to sing music like that." He made a noise like he was correcting himself. "Maybe I have the right tosingit, but not really toperformit."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Grace asked. she was quiet until now, but she spoke quickly and in a protective tone.
Alec looked at her with a shrug. "I'm not a Christian artist," he said. "I have no experience with this kind of music. People will be looking to me to be some kind of example, and I'm no preacher. I'm not even that good of a human."
People made noises of disapproval at his comment, and Alec smiled and put his palms up in a gesture of surrender.
"No, no, no, I know I'm not a terrible person, but I'm also no saint either. I'd end up getting ripped to shreds on the internet if I tried to go leading people to Jesus."
"You do not need to live a perfect life or have a degree in theology to write a song," Grace said. "And the fact that you're a human who has made a few mistakes—that just makes the whole thing better. It makes the song more compelling—more heartfelt."
"None of us are saints," Lucy added.
"I know. But people won't expect that kind of music from me. I don't know how it'll go over. It feels like a gamble."
"I don't think there's such a thing with God," Lucy said.
He gave her a reluctant shrug. "It's that, and also, I just don't want to misrepresent God," he said. "And people are going to judge me."
"Which one is true?" David asked. "You said three different things. They all sound like excuses."
"All three are true," Alec said.
David shrugged. "Since when do you care what people think? And for the record, I don't care if you release it. So, don't make it about me or the band. I think they're all good songs, and I can't see how it would affect what we're doing."
Ozzy stood there with his video camera and recorded that whole conversation. Alec played one more song, and another round of tears was shed. They sat around and talked for an hour or so after that.
Alec was completely exhausted by 3pm. Worrying about other people was as tiring as worrying about yourself, and his day had been consumed with making sure Grace was okay.
She was fine, though. He asked her several times to make sure. She was resilient, and she stayed positive, even on a highly unusual day. Alec had plenty of security on his property, but the incident on the other side of the gate had slipped by him.
He felt compelled to protect Grace, and he thought of ways he could be better at it. It made him sick that his past visited him in such horrific ways, but Grace didn't let it get to her. But their day had been an eventful one. Alec felt like it had been two days since Grace called him from the gate. Maybe he was just pushing it from his mind.
"Who wants to give Grace and me a ride back to my house?" Alec asked.
"I'm leaving soon, too," Ozzy said, "but I'm traveling by boat."
"I'm about to leave," Audrey said. "I'll give you a ride."
***
"Ozzy says he's going to edit all that stuff you were saying into the video," Audrey said to him moments later in her car. She was driving, and Alec rode in the front seat. He offered it to Grace, but she told him she preferred the back.
"Do you think it's a bad idea to release this stuff?" Alec asked, looking at Audrey from across the console.
Audrey shrugged. "I don't know. No. I don't think so. You seemed really likable, and you know how Ozzy does with the videos. I know it'll be good."
"Yeah, as long as you guys are okay with it, and of course David and the band."
"Aiden and Marc won't care," Audrey said, laughing a little. "And I'm sure Jane and Jonah will be fine with it, too. I don't see what it can hurt."
"It could hurt," Alec said. "Let's face it, my fans do not expect this of me. And I don't want anything to happen to Split Decision. If not for my own sake, then for David's"
