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He growled and surprised me when he didn’t argue further. “You are mine, Harlow. I won’t fuck my own woman with a barrier between us.”
The possessive streak did something to me, even if I did think it a bit of a caveman mentality. Had I not agreed with the sentiment, I would have told him where he could put that barrier. As it was, he was still going to need a better excuse.
“Uh huh,” I replied, my tone telling him to keep going.
He sighed and ran his hand over his jaw. I knew the full truth was coming and it was going to cost him an effort. With each sentence, each word, he walked closer to me. “I am forced to be tightly controlled and vigilant in every aspect of my life. I fight. I fuck. I protect Apollo from whatever stupid shit he gets himself into. I’ve killed people, and not always when it was the plan.” He looked at me like he was checking I was still with him. “Then there’s you. You make me not just the fists for hire, or a son of the Kincaids, or Apollo’s tame wolf. You are the closest to freedom I will ever get and...” Here, his voice softened, and he reached for me. “And I forget myself. I forget propriety. I don’t just forget but ignore everything that’s been beaten into me; never lose, never love, and never make an unworthy kid. I–”
I lay my hand on his chest, knowing how much he was revealing and thinking he didn’t need to reveal more. “If you ever give me anything...” I warned him.
The corner of his lip threatened to tip. “What are you saying, love?”
“I’m saying, as long as you promise me you’re clean, I don’t want to change a thing.”
“I deal in blood, Harlow. You better believe I get checked regularly. And I’d never fuck anyone else bare,” he added, like it was both an afterthought but also the most important point.
“You mean that, don’t you.” It wasn’t a question. I didn’t need an answer.
I could see it, in his eyes. It was the closest he’d come to telling me I meant something more to him. It was the closest he’d come to saying this could be more to him. Because it couldn’t last forever. I didn’t know how it would ever – could ever – end, but I knew that one day it had to.
“You should go,” he said softly.
“Why?” I asked.
“Before I feel the urge to remind you who you belong to right here.”
I took a deep breath and ignored my own urges. “I’ll see you at the garage at five.”
He inclined his head, almost like a bow. “I’ll see you then, princess.”
I turned to go, couldn’t help throwing him a small smile, which he very nearly returned, then waited for the lift yet again.
“Send Marco back down when you find him,” Valen said as I stepped in.
I gave him a nod. “Will do.”
“And Harlow?”
I looked up from pressing the button for the lobby. “Hm?”
“I–”
The doors closed and I debated the sense in going back. There was no sense in going back. I knew where that would lead and, while I was embracing this whole multiple sexual partners thing, I wasn’t sure I wanted to embrace it quite so back-to-back like that.
Chapter Ten
Christmas holidays at the Callahan Estate that year were much like the previous four Christmases at the Callahan Estate.
Valen had been in and out – of the estate – with his father and brothers. Apollo had been mostly locked in his father’s study under intense apprenticeship. Which left my days free to spend blissfully alone, or hanging out with Frenella as she helped Mrs Mack run the household. I tried not to think too hard about the fact that this was an apprenticeship of my own; learning how to run the Callahan Estate as I’d be expected to do once Apollo and I were married.
My nights were taken up with both Apollo and Valen, when he was there, in the rumpus room. I wasn’t sure if Apollo was trying to make sure Valen didn’t feel left out if Apollo just locked us in his room all the time, or whether he was agitated about what Valen was up to when he wasn’t there. I felt the connection between them, and it felt to me like Apollo was worried it was fraying. I just hoped it wasn’t anything to do with me. Luckily, our world was so convoluted that there were plenty of reasons other than me that it could be.
“Your parents are getting in on Friday, yes?” Frenella asked me as we were walking through the dining room.
I pulled my head out of my arse and nodded. “Yes. I think their flight’s at around midday.”
“Which will mean they get here at…” She did the maths, then smiled. “Just in time for pre-dinner drinks.”
“Mum will like that,” I commented and Frenella smiles knowingly.
