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Seated on the plush Salvation Army couch in Sally’s apartment, Anna scrolled through the apartment for rent listings, not really seeing. Not really there. Not really living and breathing.
It had been two days since she’d walked away from Blaze. For good. It had been two days of sobbing, screaming, wallowing, and finally…numbness.
It was time for her to cut the cancer from her body and live again. Live free. Live without Blaze.
She leaned in and clicked the image of a small duplex off Margaret, one street over from the high school where she’d first met Blaze.
Dammit, brain! Shut up about him!
A new life. Yup. That’s what she needed. New place to live. A new job.
She wasn’t running away and hiding. She was strategically retreating, moving her troops to higher ground. Yes. She was taking the higher ground, moving from the apartment right next to Blaze to somewhere newer, better. Some place without the taint of memories. Memories of Blaze, his one-nighters sneaking from his apartment in the morning, his smile when he looked at her, his scent, his phantom everywhere she looked. In her kitchen, her living room, holding her when she got sick, watching movies with her when she needed his company. Too many memories. Good. Bad. Too many. She needed to start over. She needed the chance to leave Blaze behind.
No, she wasn’t running away from the hurt. She was sprinting toward a new beginning, one she’d earned the hard way.
At the sound of a door cracking open and a thud and grunt, Anna glanced up from her laptop and nearly fell off the couch at the sight that greeted her.
“Sally?” she bleated. “Are you okay?” Pushing her laptop aside, Anna rose to her feet and hurried to her friend who was leaning against the hallway wall, her face pale, her hair a knotted nest of black strands, her body drooping and trembling.
Grabbing Sally’s shoulders, Anna helped her to the couch, an ache in her chest.
What happened to her friend?
“Sally, honey, what happened? Are you sick?” Anna asked softly, rubbing her hands up and down Sally’s arms gently. Sally continued to tremble, her face hidden behind a wall of hair.
“I’m…I’m just dealing with something…” Sally murmured, her voice a haunting, hollow sound that strangled Anna’s heart.
“It doesn’t look or sound like nothing, babe,” Anna remarked, dropping her hands from Sally’s arms to grip her hands and drag them into her lap. “Look, I know I’m dealing with my own shit right now, but that doesn’t mean I’m not here for you when you need me. You have to know that.”
Sally nodded limply. “I know, Anna-boo. I know.”
Anna waited silently for Sally to continue, to give any clue as to what the hell was going on with her. Fear and concern slithered up Anna’s back, and she sighed.
“You don’t have to talk to me now, Sallina, but I do expect you to figure out what you need from me and then tell me, because I will do whatever you need me to do. I’d do anything for you, Sally.”
Again, Sally nodded, this time, though, the movement had more power behind it.
Finally, Sally lifted her head and peered at Anna’s laptop screen.
“Really going through with it, huh? Breaking Blaze off like a thorn from a rose stem.” Sally’s voice had strengthened, which made Anna both relieved and wary. Whatever was going on with Sally was obviously hurting her, but if giving Sally something else to focus on would help her in the now, Anna would give it to her.
She needed the help, anyway. Anna wasn’t foolish enough to think she could take the next biggest step in her life without Sally’s help and ass kicking.
“Yes,” Anna replied, digging deep to find the necessary words. Words she never thought she would ever say. “Blaze and I are done.”
Sally raised an eyebrow, the dark circles under her eyes doing nothing to dim the sharpness that took in Anna’s face, seeking.
“Done, done? Like never going to talk to—”
“Never going to see, talk to, communicate with in any manner. Smoke signals, text messages, phone calls—nothing.” God, she sounded braver than she felt. But she had to do it, had to put her foot down and put herself first for once in eight years. “I’m not dumb enough to think I won’t run into him, since Jackson Key is about as big as a pinky nail, but that doesn’t mean I can’t go out of my way to avoid him. Moving apartments, changing jobs, maybe making new friends and hanging out wherever they congregate on weekends….” She sucked in a breath and let it out slowly. “I need to do this for me, Sally. So, yes. Done, done.”
“Have you told Greg you aren’t going back to Happy Jack’s?” Sally asked, standing to shuffle into the kitchen. The sounds of cupboards opening, a Keurig pod being inserted, and a fridge opening triggered Anna’s need for caffeine.
“Can you pop a Nantucket Blend in there when you’re done?”
“Yep,” came the reply.
Anna leaned back against the couch and closed her eyes. Unfortunately, just then, images of two nights before swamped her, making her breath catch. She groaned, tears she swore she’d emptied that morning began brewing behind her eyes.
