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For starters, I have a baby inside of me. For how long is hard to say, but that’s almost besides the point. Not being able to tell the man who claims to be my husband is difficult, but the idea that he might not be in the first place keeps my head on straight.
I need to find out exactly who he is – or whoIam –before I decide what I’m going to do.
Erik and Gregory not only seemed to know absolutely nothing about me while they were escorting me into the small town in Mexico, but it appeared like they absolutely despised me. They didn’t see me as an actual person, or at least not someone who deserved their respect. Wouldn’t Adas have put a stop to that long before I had my accident?
For someone who has such a close-knit relationship with my doctor, it seems like Adas doesn’t really know what happened or why I got hurt. He says it was “a shootout”, but he’s never specified why we were being shot at in the first place.
Where were we? Who started the shooting?
I realize that the only way I’ll get any information out of Adas is by forcing it out of him, which isn’t something I’m equipped for at all. If he has been lying to me, he can just lie some more.
The only way to find anything is to look where he doesn’t want me looking.
For the entire time we’ve been playing this game, he’s never let me into his office. He wouldn’t even give me a look inside when he was pushing me around in a wheelchair the first day after I woke up.
Maybe he didn’t know it then, but he’s told me a powerful secret without telling me anything at all.
Something is in that office, and he doesnotwant me to see it.
My plan to get inside of the office doesn’t have to be as overinvolved as my scheme to buy a pregnancy test, but I will have to wait out Adas until he decides to leave the house.
Since we’ve been back from Mexico, he’s been a little more withdrawn from me than usual, which seems to be a good indication that he knows I’m figuring him out.
Oh well. He has to leave sometime, and he can’t bring me on every mission he has. “As much as I wouldlove to,”he says.
A few days crawl by before Adas is summoned to the new location of all his rain-damaged cocaine from the storm. It’s not super far away, but if he leaves now, he’ll be stuck in traffic on the way back. The idea of such a commanding presence being stuck in traffic is absurdly funny to me, but I need to keep myself focused.
Adas has a secret, and I’m going to find it out.
Just before he leaves for his meeting, he enters the room we now share together, much to my annoyance.
“Hey sweetie, I’m taking off now. I’ll be back as soon as I can, but there’s supposed to be a storm coming later in the day. I’m not sure when yet, but it might be just as bad as the first one,” he says, leaning down and kissing my cheek.
Perfect.
“Oh no, are you sure it’s safe for you to go?” I ask, putting on my most convincingly innocent voice. At this point, it truly feels like I’m playing a character.
He pauses for a moment. “No, I’m not. But I’m a leader, and I need to lead my people no matter what.”
I take his hand, placing it against my cheek. “You’re so brave. I love that about you,” I say sweetly as I look into his eyes.
He kisses me again, this time with more depth, more hold.
I can’t believe that worked.
“I’ll see you soon,” he says just before he leaves as he closes the door behind him.
I let go of the gigantic breath of anxiety I’ve been holding onto since he walked in here. I know better than to sprint to the office and tear everything up, but I’m so fired up to finally discover what the fuck this has all been about.
Our bedroom doesn’t have a view of the driveway, so I sneak over to the opposite side of the house, where the kitchen is. I crouch down right by the window just as I hear his car leave. The sound of the engine is unmistakable, something he’s bragged about to me on many occasions.
As soon as I’m positive he’s leaving, I set a twenty-minute timer for myself. If he doesn’t come back in twenty minutes, I’m safe to snoop around in his office.
I have no idea how to occupy myself for those twenty minutes. I could try reading, watching a movie, masturbating, anything, but the only thing I really want to do is storm that desk.
The only thing I can do to distract myself is to practice walking more, which is something I’ve done to absolute death in the past few weeks.
I spend seventeen minutes walking a straight line back and forth without my crutches until I’m ready to lose my mind. By the time I get back up to the office, the timer will have gone off anyway.
