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I couldn’t help but grin. “I make you nervous?”
She met my gaze, shivered, and jumped up to get a sweatshirt. “No,” she said as she pulled the shirt on, contradicting herself. “Is everything okay with you? With whatever came up, I mean.”
“Yeah…” I stretched my legs out and clasped my hands behind my head. “Nothing I can discuss, but there are days when I feel more like a figurehead with a title, following the protocol, the pomp and circumstance, and less like a person figuring out the biggest decisions of my life.”
“You’re more than just a title, Holden,” she said softly, offering me another smile that made me feel alive and awake different than the run with Garrett had. “And the decisions you make have meaning. Like choosing to save my life when you could have let Branson kill me.”
Our eyes locked for several heartbeats, and I felt this hum of energy pass between us, lighting me up from the inside out. I didn’t know what to make of it.
“Thank you for that,” I managed to say. “So, you’re okay then?”
She shrugged. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Well, I watched the videos from today. Your disqualification had to have upset you.” It had been clear on her face just how much.
Kayden let out a huff. “More than anything, it taught me a valuable lesson.”
“What’s that?”
“That I’m the only one who has my own back, and I’d be wise to remember that.”
Interesting. She wasn’t blaming Sydnee, which was very big of her. She hadn’t fought the decision, either. She played fair and square but expected the same of others. Perhaps it would be a good lesson for her. In our world, building trust takes time. She shouldn’t give it away so easily.
“I’ll let you get some sleep. I didn’t mean to wake you.” I stood and walked toward the door. If I remained there alone with Kayden for too much longer, surrounded by her captivating scent and natural beauty, I might not be able to control myself.
She followed me to the door. “I wasn’t actually asleep yet. Replaying the day, you know. But I am pretty tired.”
I stopped at the doorway and turned to face her once more. “I’m glad you’re okay. And Kayden?”
“Yes?” She looked up at me with those big eyes, and something twisted in my chest.
“Sleep well,” I said quickly, then hurried from the room.
On the way back to my quarters, I tried to figure out what had me acting so differently towards her than the other women, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Sure, her personality was strong and fierce, which I admired alongside her desire to be a good person. But it was more than that.
I settled back in front of my screen and rewatched the tapes, trying to pay more attention to the others than I did to Kayden this time. I had an elimination to make, after all.
In the end, I chose Cora. She’d eliminated herself by going up to Jessica and allowing her to rip her collar right off towards the end as if she wanted to go home. I wasn’t going to keep women here against their will. If this wasn’t for them, or they didn’t want to be my mate, better to know it now than later.
But as I tried to fall asleep, I could only think about Kayden. Shehadn’twanted to be here, though she was giving it her all now, something that had been clear in the videos. Had she changed her mind? Was she considering the idea of being my mate?
I wouldn’t have thought it possible at the beginning of the week. But now, I couldn’t help but hope that her renewed efforts had less to do with getting away from Branson by earning a spot in the top ten and more to do with the idea of a future—with me.
15
KAYDEN
Two days had passed since the first competition, and Holden had been at every meal. No more breakfast in bed or lunches with Jessica for me. No private dinners with him.
As the Contention got into full swing and we all settled into the rhythms of PT and classes, Holden was making a point of spending lots of time with everyone. Which meant he’d spent much less time with me.
I didn’t like that I was upset over it. And I wasn’t pleased with my reaction when he sat next to Sydnee at dinner last night. My stomach had twisted, my chest tightened, and a wave of jealousy had washed over me. The fact that I wanted his attention on me said more than anything. My recent fears that I wasn’t just interested in securing a top ten position came pouring out.
As I sat eating breakfast in the large dining hall, I didn’t know what to make of it. It would change everything if I admitted to myself that I was interested in Holden.
“May I join you for breakfast?”
The familiar deep voice had me jerking my head up. Brooklyn, who’d been chattering away to Jessica, stopped talking, her mouth open as Holden pulled out the chair next to me. He looked at me, warm brown eyes sparkling as he smiled, waiting for my answer.
