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Niles catches onto my shift in demeanor and puts his hands up, palms out, in an attempt to smooth tensions. “Let’s all just take a breath and count to ten.”
“Cut the pussy shit,” Dean remarks, but there’s no heat behind it that I can discern.
“Hey, don’t yell at him,” Shane snaps.
“Did I raise my voice? No.” Dean is in a mood, and while I don’t know him from Adam, I feel a need to reach out and try to instill some calm.
“Hey,” I say softly, touching his bicep, “I think Niles is right. We all need to take a step back and breathe right now.”
Dean looks down over his shoulder at me and, after a brief pause, he nods. “Fine.” Then he pushes past Niles and Shane and rounds the counter to sit on the stools on the other side.
I look around at each of the men, unsure of how we got to this place but hoping we can find some calm grounds once again. I don’t like the idea of them fighting, especially not over me. And since I’m the common denominator here…
“I should probably go.”
All three of them scowl.
“Why?” Niles asks.
“That’s not necessary,” says Shane.
“Not on your damn life,” Dean states. “And I mean that literally. The roads are shit.”
I spread my hands out before me. “It’s clear that my just being here has disrupted whatever balance you had going on. I don’t want to be the person who breaks up a years’ long friendship. I’m no Yoko.”
“Don’t even worry about it,” Dean dismisses.
“Yeah, we’re three bachelors living under the same roof. This isn’t the first time we’ve butted heads.”
“Normally,” Niles adds, “it’s worse than this.”
“Worse?” I ask, concerned.
Dean is nodding. “Sometimes, it comes to blows.”
My eyes widen. They’ve hit each other? And they’re still friends? The one and only time I ever got into a fight with a girlfriend of mine was when I was eight. We exchanged words, she pushed me, and I fell backward onto the corner of an out-of-place dresser drawer lying on the floor. After busting my ass good, I got up, informed her we were no longer friends, and we never spoke again. This whole concept they’ve presented me with is completely foreign to me.
“We’re already over it,” Shane informs me, and now there’s pleading in his eyes, as if he’s begging me to let it go too, as if he wants me to stay as much as I wanted to a few minutes ago.
In that moment, I’m overwhelmed. Shaking my head, I tell them, “This is…I need a minute to wrap my head around all of this.” I move forward, toward Niles and Shane, and then past them.
“Where are you going?” Niles is worried, and I can’t blame him. He doesn’t know me either, so it’s impossible to predict my reaction to everything.
“Upstairs to my room. I need some time to think.”
I don’t hear any protests, so I keep walking… all the way up to the guest bedroom where I close the door and climb back into bed.
I feel the cold in the air again, and instantly I mourn the loss of what could have been. Damn, not even one night together and already there’s drama. Maybe I am in over my head.
