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He still needed to end it.
But his obsession with her denied every sane thought in his head.
He couldn’t be honorable. Not today at least.
{ Chapter 12 }
“I have a surprise for you.”
Torrie pulled upright from her last deep stretch as she approached Roe leaning against the ladder to the forecastle deck. Her hands went to her hips as she tried to catch her breath. For all the good the stretches did for her legs, her lungs screamed after every session that they weren’t built for taking in as much air as the exercise demanded.
She peeked over her shoulder at the thin line of greyness creeping into the dark on the far horizon. “It’s almost daybreak—shouldn’t I be scurrying back into your cabin?”
The lantern five feet to his left lent light enough to see his face as he grinned. “Normally, yes. But not this morning. This morning we wait for the sun.”
“The smile on your face makes me suspicious.”
“Always be suspicious of a sailor.” He held out his hand to her. “Come, we’ll go onto the forecastle deck to watch the water while avoiding the crew as they stumble awake.”
She climbed the rungs to the forecastle deck with Roe right behind her, his arms wrapping her from behind, and then he led her to the port side of the deck. She tried to catch her breath as she leaned forward on the railing, her forearms balancing on the worn wood. Roe stood straight beside her with both his hands on the rail, his thumbs tapping the smooth grain of the wood.
“We’re not facing east, so it isn’t the sunrise we’re waiting for—what is it I should be watching for?” The sliver of light from the rising sun to her right was edging the blackness of the sky into a grey that drifted into a dusty blue. She looked up at him. Enough light now to see Roe’s features without a lantern.
He didn’t look down at her, just kept his focus forward. “Patience. It will come to you.”
As much as she wanted to look forward, her stare stayed stuck on his profile. The night turning to light just beyond him lent an ethereal glow to his head. The blackness above blended into his dark hair, but then grey-blue brightness cut across the edges of his features—along his strong jawline with its scruff of a beard, along the cheeks and mouth she loved to drag her fingertips across, along his eyes. His steel grey eyes that looked almost blue in the light of the dawn. The man was one of the most beautiful creatures ever brought forth on this earth.
He didn’t flinch under her gaze, though she knew her stare held onto him far too long.
As hard as it was to drag her look off him, she turned her head and searched the undulating waves before them.
“Is that…” Her look whipped to Roe. “Land?”
A smile broke free on his face and he nodded. “Land.”
She searched the dark outline of far-off land jutting up from the murky depths of the sea. “Why didn’t you tell me it was coming?”
“One can never guarantee anything on how a ship travels, and I didn’t want to get your hopes up that we would be there soon.”
Her eyes squinted. “How far away is it?”
“We should arrive in port tonight before nightfall. We just have to run along the coast to Plymouth Dock, so unless these clear skies turn to storms, I should have you back on solid land within the day.”
A smile so wide it hurt her cheeks cut across her face. “I can hardly wait. My feet much prefer solid ground under them.”
He chuckled. “Aye. Mine as well. Solid ground and then home for you.”
She watched the line of land bob as the ship cut across the waves, the smile slowly fading from her face.
Home.
She guessed he meant her London townhouse. Which had never felt like a true home to her. Desolate except for her staff. She hadn’t even realized how truly empty the whole of her life was. Even when she lived at the Apton townhome, she had never felt truly comfortable there, though she at least had her husband for company.
Vinehill had been her one true home, once full of laughter and love and life. But she’d vowed to never go back there. Never to revisit the monster the pain of the fire had turned her into during that dark time in her life.
Her head dipped down slightly, her look going to the waters before them. Roe had made no mention of accompanying her. No mention of their lives entwined in any way beyond the moment they stepped off this ship.
Not that she had expected anything. Not that she could ask him for more. Not that she hadthoughtat all.
