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Evan moved fully into the room and shut the door behind him. He went to the table to set his plate down and then turned to the earl.
“The lass is still gone?”
Evan offered one nod. “She is.”
“Fool boy, you’re letting a lifetime of denying yourself become a future of denying yourself.” He waved Evan over to him, pointing at the chair opposite him. He waited for Evan to cross the room before he continued. “Ye’ve never lived yer true heart, my lad.”
His hand on the top of the opposite chair, Evan couldn’t sit down. He’d been sitting, sulking for three days and he was done with sitting. “I’ve never heard ye discuss hearts, Grandfather.”
“It’s about time I did. I should have long ago, so this all could have been different. Ye are the future of the line, Ev. The true future and I need ye to embrace that.”
Evan shook his head, choosing his words with care. “I don’t know if that’s to be. But Gilroy and his heirs will make fine earls.”
“That boy?” His grandfather spit off to the side. “Never. I’ll hold on as long as I need to, to make sure Gil doesn’t inherit.”
Evan stilled, reeling back slightly. “But you’re not well.”
“I can live forever.” His ancient grey eyes skewered Evan. “Don’t try to rewrite history, lad.”
“I’m not.”
“Except ye are. What? You swore an oath to Gil when ye were a wee whelp and now ye think holding true to that vow is the thing that makes ye a man?”
Shit.How long had his grandfather suspected—known? His look narrowed on his grandfather. “What do you know of it?”
“I know ye can be an idiot. Yer the first born, Ev. The rightful heir. History does not change just because ye wish it so.” He leaned toward Evan, his voice dropping into low plea. “But never mind all that business—it is past. Forget about what ye promised Gil. Ye have a chance to change this—change this for all of us, Ev.”
“I cannot do that to my brother.”
“But ye can do it to yerself?” He lifted his cane, jabbing it in the air at Evan. “To me? Deny everything ye have right to?”
Evan’s hand flipped up from the back of the chair. “You’ll be dead. I’m the one that will live with it. And I’ve always been at peace with Gilroy’s heirs taking over the title.”
“Except it’s not just you that’ll have to live with it. That bonnie lass ye married, she’ll have to live with it as well. She loves ye, Ev. It was clear with every glance she shot your way. Did ye not see the way her pinky would always stretch out to ye when ye were standing next to each other?” He lifted his hand, wiggling his gnarled pinky. “Just the flick of that tiny digit, so that some part of her was touching some part of you. Yer arm, yer leg. That pinky was always wagging.”
He thumped the tip of his cane into the floor by his feet. “I’ve never seen two people deny themselves as fervently as you two did, when everything ye wanted was in each other. Two more stubborn, martyring idiots there never were. But ye both have spines of honor on your side, and that makes ye the ones to lead Whetland into the next generation.”
“But Gilroy—”
His cane slammed hard into the floor. “You’re the dammed future of this family, Evan. You.”
“I’m not.”
“What, ye think Gil can handle it? He was never the future. It’s always been you. Can you honestly tell me ye think he’ll do a better job of it than you?
Evan shrugged. “It doesn’t matter what I think.”
“You’re the heir I would choose a thousand times over.” His grandfather’s voice softened almost to a whisper. “Why can ye never see that in yourself?”
The world suddenly heavy upon him, Evan sank into the chair. His fingers went to his eyes, attempting to rub away everything that he didn’t want to acknowledge but knew he had to. His hand dropped away from his face and he looked to his grandfather. “I cannot want things I know will get taken away.”
The earl nodded, relief in his eyes as he finally approved of what Evan said. “Yet ye want Juliet.”
Evan exhaled a defeated breath. “I do.”
“Then want her.” The earl leaned forward in his chair, his voice rock solid, the words forceful from his lips. “Want her. Get her. Find the lass.”
It was enough to make Evan stand against the weight crushing him down, all of the demons he’d been wrestling with the last several days crashing down about him.
