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His step faltered. That word had cropped up more and more throughout the past week. He couldn’t pinpoint the moment he’d gone from living in the moment to thinking of the future. A future he had never before contemplated; at least, not one with a woman in it. But now when he thought of the future, he couldn’t see one without Anna in it.
What would she say if he told her all? Over the past few days, she’d slowly drawn out details he hadn’t shared with anyone. How he felt even more estranged from his brothers in recent months. Anna, bless her, hadn’t coddled him or backed down. No, that newfound fire had surged forth once more and she’d challenged him to talk to them after Alejandro’s honeymoon.
“You’ve put up the walls,” she’d said. “So why not tear them down if it’s making you unhappy?”
She’d accepted everything so far. If he told her about the accident, about the guilt he’d been carrying around for so long, would she stay? Could confession be the first step toward a life that meant something more? Toward healing not only himself but his relationships with his brothers? With Anna? Maybe even William?
Anna looked up, her smile falling when she saw his face.
“Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine,” he said, leaning down to kiss her. Another selfish indulgence, but one he’d embraced gladly. The first day they’d gone out after spending the previous afternoon and evening in bed together, Anna had curled into his side and wrapped an arm around his waist with an intimate ease that had both terrified and thrilled him. Aware that photographers could be hiding anywhere, he’d allowed it. As the day had progressed, he’d found himself responding in kind, kissing her cheek, reaching out for her hand.
It wasn’t just sex with Anna. No, it was the intimacy, the familiarity, that made his time with her so enjoyable. He hadn’t felt like himself in a long while, but she dragged it out of him, made him relax.
He sat across from her and picked up his wineglass, watching the candlelight play over the ruby-red liquid.
“Alejandro called to confirm tomorrow.”
She grimaced. “I’m not looking forward to that.”
“Why not? You’ll get to see your aunt and uncle. My family’s looking forward to seeing you, too.”
“And that’ll be nice. It’s just...” She bit down on her lower lip. A habit, he’d noticed, when she was worried about something.
“Just what?” he asked, reaching across the table and capturing her hand in his. She slowly breathed out.
“I don’t like lying to our families.”
“I don’t, either. But it won’t hurt them in the long run.”
One bare shoulder rose and fell in a shrug. “True. It’s not like we’re pretending to be engaged or something.”
His eyes dropped to the diamond bracelet on her wrist. What would it be like to put another type of diamond on her hand?
“I’m also surprised at how easily my family accepted the story of us dating,” Anna continued, oblivious to his inner turmoil. “They were intrusive, almost obsessive, about who I dated in college. But they’ve barely talked to me the past two weeks.”
He kept his expression neutral. The couple of times he’d been in touch with Diego, the butler had been surprisingly overjoyed at the thought of Anna and Antonio dating. Antonio hadn’t been able to bring himself to tell Diego that it was all a lie.
“They knew you and I were close as children. I wouldn’t read too much into it.”
She squeezed his hand and gave him another heart-stopping smile. “You’re probably right. No sense worrying about it right now when we have this view.” A dimple flashed in her cheek.
He tried to refocus, to enjoy the rest of their evening. But their brief conversation about the wedding, the impending deadline on their fake relationship, clouded his earlier happiness. Even seeing Anna’s eyes widen in delight at the dessert, lemon sorbet drizzled with red raspberry sauce and topped with fresh mint leaves, did little to assuage his bad mood. He was at a crossroads. He could tell Anna and risk her rejection.
Or she could accept him, ugly past and all. He didn’t know which of the two frightened him more.
The ridedown the mountain increased his impending sense of doom. His driver took a curve a touch too fast, the move making Anna fall against him as his heart thundered in his chest. He’d slept next to Anna every night the last six nights. Each morning, he’d awoken nightmare-free. Another sign, he thought, that perhaps his time with Anna was healing the past.
But now, as the car moved back into its lane and continued on, adrenaline pumped through his veins as tires screeched in his mind and William cried out.
Anna, bless her, looked out the window, soaking in the sights and thankfully missing the past burrowing its way back under his skin.
He helped her out of the car back at the hotel. She smiled at the freshly painted flowers and now working fountain, the water splashing down in a tinkling melody. She’d mentioned it to him the other day, about how she looked forward to seeing the final results. He’d paid triple for a local gardener to come in and plant an array of lush blooms, as well as a bonus to the construction workers to get the fountain working before Thursday evening.
Before they left. Because he’d wanted Anna to see it. Not because it was a practical business decision or because it was a necessity. No, he’d done something spur-of-the-moment just because he’d wanted to make her happy.
The elevator ground to a halt. Antonio swore and punched a button.
