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“It was like… a pull inside my chest,” Jason mutters. “I knew it came from here. I knew it came from one of you. What is this new fuckery?”
“Calm your tits,” Emrys says. “I’d ask you to use your brain to help us figure this out but alas, I’m not sure you have anything inside that blond head of yours.”
Jason sits down on his haunches. “Figure what out. Wait, is he… is heshifting?”
“Maybe you can tell us,” Sindri says under his breath. “You’re the only one with experience in that shit.”
“Your perspicacity astounds me,” Jason drawls in a pretty good imitation of Sindri’s usual haughty tones.
It earns him an eye roll from the fae boy. “Think, Jason. This could happen to any of us.”
“I see. What you’re trying to say is that you’re both scared shitless because it’s never happened to you and for the first time in your lives you realize you could also turn into the beasts you loathe. Turn into an animal.”
“Fuck you, Jax,” Emrys spits. “We helped you control your shift, didn’t we? Stop being such an ass. Yeah, he’s a vampire. Deal with it. What’s your crusade against him about? He’s our age. I doubt he could have tormented you in any way before.”
“And what do you know about his life to be able to say that?” Jason’s voice goes quiet and flat. “Did you know that vampires keep werewolves as pets sometimes? Give them to their children to play with?”
“That’s bullshit.” Emrys snorts.
“Is it?” Jason says, still in that quiet voice.
My heart is thudding in my chest. It’s as if I sense pain from him, so much pain compressed into a jagged crystal that makes his heart bleed day and night. I want to go to him, put my arms around him.
But abruptly Jason gets up again. “You know as well as I how to stop and reverse the shift before he goes full panther or whatever it is he’s turning into.”
I flinch and glance at Emrys. I half-expect him to grin and say“sex, told ya”like he always does, but he’s silent, frowning. He doesn’t trust me anymore and it’s only a matter of time before he tells the others of his suspicions. Question is why he hasn’t done so yet—but probably he’s distracted by Ashton’s conundrum and Jason’s anger.
Or maybe he wants to see if I really am a witch. If I can really help Ashton.
Can I?
“If he’s not hearing us,” Jason goes on, “if he’s not connected to reality, the shift hasn’t stopped. There is a stretch of time between losing control and starting to morph, a time when your brain can’t cope with more input. And after that, it may be too late.”
“Maybe he can control it,” Emrys says. “You do understand human speech after you shift, right? Maybe—”
“It’s his first shift,” Jason says harshly. “First shifts are the worst. They take over you, rip you apart, confuse you, disorient you. Don’t rely on Ash to fix this. He’ll probably go full animal and rampage before he discovers the human thread in his mind leading him back. Without guidance, that can take time.”
“Was your first time so bad? Did you have your family around you?” I whisper.
“No, I didn’t have my family around me,” he grinds out. “And it was hell.”
20
MIA
“So what do we do?” I whisper.
“We can’t take him back to the dormitories like this,” Sindri says. “Can’t let the others see him, know that he may have lost control. This is our secret. If it gets out, we could get locked up for being a danger to society.”
I could go and tell Miss Worthy or the Headmaster. I could betray them once and for all, deliver them into the hands of the demon police to be locked up.
Emrys must have had the same thought because his dark gaze cuts to me. “We stay here,” he says, “let Mia try and help Ash. Go from there.”
“Back to nature,” Jason mutters. “How fucking romantic.”
But what this means is… “I’m not sure I… You want me to lie with a half-beast?”
Jason’s jaw clenches. A vein in his neck starts beating fast. “All of us have a beast inside. Besides, you did the same for me.”
