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"You've been reading this?"I ask.
She nods.
"Stop."
"It's public."
"Stop reading his," I say. "It's for me."
She smiles.
"What?"
"You love him."
"Shut up."
"So, you forgive him?" she asks.
"I don't know yet."
"I think you do."
ChapterForty-Nine
"Start at the Beginning."
By One Trick Pony
Sunday July 31st, 3 P.M.
Dear Diary,
She doesn't start this way, but D did. M too.
I know, I know, what kind of monster reads both his sisters' diaries? And his girlfriend's diary?
A curious one.
I have an excuse for hers. Really. I don't want to spin excuses. But I have reasons.
I needed to understand.
After D died, I needed to understand. I would have done anything to understand. And her site—D was a subscriber—dropped in my lap.
Who could have turned away?
She's a great writer too. Witty and smart and brave as hell.
She offered me her heart, and I drank with greedy sips.
Those are reasons.
And this is the story I tell myself, the story I've told myself again and again.
It feels true.
