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His hazel eyes seek mine and he frowns, almost like he doesn’t realize what’s happening yet. “Xan.”
“Nik,” I choke out, barely recognizing the sound of my own voice. “Goddamnit.”
“It’s bad, isn’t it?”
“No,” I growl, frantically shaking my head to reassure us both. “No, it’s fine. You’re gonna be fine.”
He laughs at that, because of course my idiot brother would laugh at a time like this. “You suck at lying.”
Fucking hell.
Thick tears stream over my face and he smiles at me, slowly lifting his hand up to the back of my neck to pull me into him. “Do me a favor, okay?”
“What favor?” I ask, trying and failing to hide the sob creeping up my throat.
“Don’t let this change you into something you’re not,” he croaks out, sucking a shaky breath into his lungs before he continues. “I don’t want you becoming a moody little bitch with no friends and no life.”
“What am I supposed to be?”
“Just be you,” he says simply. “Irresponsible and reckless and fuckin’ stupid, like always.”
I shake my head and he tries to tighten his grip on me, weakly squeezing my jaw to pull my eyes back to his pale ones.
They’re fading.
He’s dying right in front of me and I can’t stop it.
“Promise me, Xan.”
“And if I don’t?”
“I’ll haunt your skinny ass until you cry,” he jokes, smirking when he catches the look on my face.
“You’re not funny.”
“I think I’m funny.”
I cry and rest my forehead against his, hugging him the best I can with my hands where they are.
“Hey, Xan?”
“What?” I ask through my tears, pulling back an inch to look him in the eye.
“I dare you.”
26
Jordyn
present
My heart hurts for him and I bury my face into the crook of his neck, gently running my nails over his scalp in an attempt to comfort him. “It wasn’t your fault, Xan,” I whisper, barely managing to hide the silent tears leaking from my eyes. “You were just a kid. You didn’t know what would happen.”
He chuckles sadly at that, tightening his arms around my waist while he kisses the side of my head. “My parents don’t agree with you, princess. They know I started the fight with the guy who killed him. They think it should have been me.”
“They said that to you?”
He shrugs and I close my eyes, pissed off and disgusted at the way they’ve treated their own son for the last three years. I get they must have been heartbroken after Niko died, I really do, but if I ever have children of my own someday, I like to think I’d love them unconditionally – something we’ve both missed out on, it seems.
