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‘Are you kidding me? It was incredibly kind of you. You just caught me unaware, that’s all.’ She wiped her damp cheeks. ‘It’s a lovely gift and I’ll treasure it always.’
It was a while before Calvin spoke. ‘Why did he take his own life? Do you know?’
‘That’s the million-dollar question. I guess we’ll never know for certain.’
‘Had he been depressed?’
‘Who knows. Although Mum said he’d been unusually quiet and preoccupied in the weeks leading up to it. He was stressed about work, and he’d drunkenly confessed to a mate that he was scared of letting his family down. He worried about not being a good provider, and being more of a burden than a help.’
‘That must’ve been difficult for your mum.’
‘It tortured her for years. They’d had their difficulties, but she never dreamt he felt that way. It made her incredibly angry that he never confided in her.’
‘I can imagine.’
She tore off a wodge of loo roll and wiped her eyes. ‘Maybe if he had, she could’ve reassured him everything was okay. Or at least persuaded him to get some help. But mental health wasn’ttalked about so much in those days. It’s hard enough talking about it now, as we both know.’
Another lengthy silence followed. ‘Is that why you’ve been so determined I get professional help? You’re worried I might do the same thing?’
She closed her eyes. ‘I guess.’
‘Oh, Kate, that’s not something I’d ever do. I promise you. Things have been tough, but I know they’ll get better. Or at least, I hope they will. If I’d known that’s why you were so worried, I’d never have been so insensitive about it. I’m so sorry.’
‘You weren’t to know. I’d just hate for your family to be left like ours were, confused and hurt, and wishing they’d known something was up so they could’ve helped.’
‘God, that must’ve been awful.’ His voice was barely a whisper.
She let out a sigh, relieved her breathing had returned to normal. ‘Mind you, it’s not like you’ve ever hidden your pain, not really. You might not want to talk to a stranger about it, but you’ve always been honest about your struggles with those close to you. Perhaps it’s me who’s being unfair. Maybe I’m projecting my experiences onto you and you’re absolutely fine.’
‘Hardly.’
‘Well, as fine as you can be, in the circumstances.’ She wiped her clammy hands on her leggings.
‘Kate…? Can you open the door, please? I need to see you’re okay.’
It was time to face him. She couldn’t stay hidden forever.
Resigned to her fate, she shuffled onto her knees and stood up. ‘I’m sorry for having a meltdown,’ she said, opening the door. ‘I really do love the guitar. I’m beyond touched that you got me something so special. Thank you.’
‘Come here,’ he said, opening his arms.
Only a fool wouldn’t go to him. It was the right thing to do. Not just for her own comfort, but for his, too. They’d bothbeen through hell. And this was their last night together. After tomorrow they would be flying solo in the world, each trying to find their path in life and recover from their trauma.
As she stepped into his embrace, breathing in his aftershave, and feeling his arms tighten around her, another wave of emotion threatened to undo her. It wasn’t like the pain of losing Tristan, which had been destructive and soul-destroying. This loss was built on pure love alone. Calvin had never been anything but kind to her. Supportive. Fun. He’d made her feel capable and strong. And she’d always be grateful to him. It was an even bigger gift than the guitar.
But their embrace was interrupted by a loud bang that made them both jump.
As they sprung apart, they noticed that the window had crashed open and hit the wall, letting in a blast of cold air.
‘That bloody window,’ he said, shooting over to close it, only to be smacked in the face by something small and dark flying towards him. ‘What thef…?’ His arms flailed about, sending the creature into a terrified frenzy.
‘Stop moving!’ Kate cried, as she ran over. ‘Stay still!’ But he was in full panic mode, trying to beat the thing away.
‘Get it off me!’ he yelled, trying to escape the onslaught. ‘What the hell is it?’
‘It’s a bat,’ she said, trying to catch his flailing arms.
‘A bat?Shit!’ He flung himself around the room, waving his arms about, which only frightened the poor creature even more – as he was now entangled in Calvin’s hair.
