Page 64 of Hate Notes


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Five minutes later, I was settled in between them, picking at the popcorn, when Dad slung his arm around me and pulled me closer. With a sigh, I rested my head against his shoulder, but no matter how much I tried to focus on the movie, I found it impossible.

Soon, my thoughts shifted from the giant shark on screen to Mr. Elliot, and I replayed our conversation in my head, hating that my father worked for him and telling myself his threat was a bluff and nothing more. After all, Topher’s choices were his own, and I had nothing to do with it.

Still, my eyes strayed to my father’s face. He was quiet, intensely focused on the film, which was one of his favorites, and I suddenly felt an overwhelming rush of gratitude that I had someone like him. Someone who would support me no matter who I was or what I wanted to do in life.

“Love you, Dad,” I murmured.

He gave my shoulders a squeeze as he peeled his gaze from the screen, and the corners of his eyes crinkled. “Love you too, P.” He brushed the hair off my face, getting a better look at me. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, fine.” I settled back into his shoulder and returned my attention to the movie.

A little over an hour later, I hit the shower, feeling only slightly better about my crappy day. I turned the water off and stepped out, then wrapped a towel around me, and headed for my room, where I flopped down on my bed and scrolled through the IRL playlist on my phone when a text came through from Topher.

I contemplated ignoring it. He thought Julie stood him up, so maybe it was best to cut him off now, cold turkey.

But after a moment, curiosity got the best of me. I cursed myself for being weak and opened up his message.

Jerkwad:Hey, you there? Can we talk?

I bit my lip, knowing I should ignore him, but I couldn’t seem to help myself where he was concerned. I liked him too much, a fact that should’ve been apparent before today but wasn’t. Apparently, I was an excellent liar, after all, especially to myself.

I replied, “Yeah, I’m here,” and hit send, then proceeded to scold myself for my lack of self-control.

A second later, my phone rang, and my stomach lurched as I took in the name on the screen. It was him. Worse yet, it was a video chat.

I threw my phone down on the bed like it was an atomic bomb, then jumped away like it might explode.

Crap. Crap. Crap.When he asked if we could talk, I assumed he meant via text, NOT FACETIME.

My heart banged against my ribs as I contemplated my options: A, don’t answer, which might arouse suspicions, or B, answer and out myself.

I bit my lip. Maybe this was best. All I had to do was accept the call, and once and for all, he’d know the truth. Boom! Finished. No more lying. No more fearing my secret.

But another truth slammed into me.

I wasn’t ready for this to end, and the second he discovered I had been lying to him this whole time, that I was Julie, he’d hate me. I was suddenly sure of it.

The call went to voicemail, and I yelled, “No!”

I grabbed the phone, and it immediately began to ring again.

I glanced around me frantically, searching for a way to disguise myself when my gaze landed on a package of expensive sheet masks Scarlett bought me for my birthday. I’d been saving them, knowing once they were gone I couldn’t afford to replace them.

I snatched them up, ripped open the package, and took one of the delicate, soggy masks out and placed it gingerly over my face. Then I whipped my hair up into a messy bun and squeezed my eyes closed, saying a prayer for strength as I swiped to accept the call.

When his face popped up on my screen, I gripped the phone so tight my hand ached. My heart soared at the sight of him before it subsequently plummeted to somewhere deep beneath the earth’s atmosphere at the sight of myself in the little window at the bottom of the screen.

Liquid dripped from the edges of the gauzy white mask. Only my lips and eyes were clearly visible, and I looked completely crazy.

“Uh . . .” Topher just barely stifled a laugh while my heart threatened to explode, and I realized all too late that I was still in nothing but my bath towel.

My face flushed underneath the mask as I clutched the top of the towel where it was knotted at my chest. “Sorry,” I said, then realized I had used my real voice, so I corrected it with an exaggerated rasp. “Sorry, I just got out of the shower and didn’t expect you to call.”

Topher’s smile faded. “Are you okay? Your voice sounds really weird.”

“Oh, yeah.” I coughed for effect. “I just have a cold.”

“Oh. Is that why you didn’t show today?”

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