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I blush furiously. ‘Thank you, but that’s not the point.’
‘What is the point?’
‘The point is that it would be a mistake for us to do anything with this. If we had a relationship and it didn’t work out, consider how toxic things would be in the kitchen.’
‘Well, if that happened, then I guess I’d have to leave.’
‘But I don’t want you to leave! We’re building something good here, and I want you to carry on being a part of it. It was partly your passion that persuaded me to take this on in the first place. I can’t do it without you.’
‘I’m just a chef. There are plenty of other chefs out there who could do just as good a job as me.’
‘You know that’s not true. You have a real connection to the café. You feel just as strongly about it as me, I know you do. Admit it, we make a good team in the kitchen, and that’s what I don’t want to risk.’
‘I understand. So, we make sure we’re fully covered up at all times and keep our eyes firmly above the shoulder. If you like, we could draw up a bathroom rota, so we don’t surprise each other again before the lock is fitted.’
‘Now you’re talking sense. That sounds like a good idea. I’ll get a piece of paper, hang on.’
‘Daisy?’ Matt asks, as I’m rummaging in a kitchen drawer, trying to find the little notepad that I write shopping lists on.
‘Yes?’
‘There is another way we could deal with this.’
‘Go on.’
‘Well, even if we draw up the rota, stay covered up, and all the other stuff I just said, I think there’s still going to be an issue. We both liked what we saw, and now there’s this big “what if” question mark hanging over us. I don’t think the current plan is going to get rid of that.’
‘What are you proposing, then?’
‘What if we answered the question? What if we made love, just once, and got it out of our system? Mystery solved, and we can go back to normal. Plus, if you burst in on me when I’m shaving again, there won’t be anything you haven’t seen before, and it won’t be a problem.’
‘Kind of like ripping the plaster off? Get it over with and move on?’
‘Exactly. I reckon it’s got to be better than us tiptoeing around each other like we have been today.’
I consider his proposal. It’s difficult to be objective, though, because every fibre of my being is screaming, ‘Yes, yes, yes! What are you waiting for, you stupid cow?’
‘One time only?’ I ask.
‘One time only. Then we go back to normal.’
‘Okay.’ I walk over to him, take his hand and lead him into my bedroom, leaving the tea to get cold on the living room table.
* * *
‘Matt, this isn’t working, is it?’
‘Hm?’
Predictably, it didn’t turn out to be a one-time only thing. So far, we’ve had to ‘get it of our system’ every day this week, sometimes more than once. I never knew sex could be this visceral. It’s like we can’t get enough of each other; we’ve even had to introduce a ‘no touching at work’ rule, because getting frisky in a commercial kitchen is a sure-fire way to end up in A&E with an embarrassing story to tell. At least the awkwardness of last Sunday is gone, I suppose. Matt came with me to test drive the van on Wednesday, and because there are only two seats in it, the sales guy had to let us take it out on our own. We were so pent up that it was all we could do not to park up in a lay-by and climb into the back. When we got home, we sprinted up the stairs to the flat and didn’t even make it to the bedroom. I did manage to linger at the dealership long enough to place an order and, luckily, they had a van in stock with the spec I wanted, so I’m picking it up next Saturday after work.
‘This “one time and we’ll go back to normal” thing. It’s not working.’
‘Ah, well. Maybe we’ll just have to live with this as the new normal,’ he replies, wrapping me up in his huge arms. God, I love the feel of his skin against mine. I breathe deeply, inhaling the smell of him. It’s a heady mixture of deodorant, soap, and fresh sweat from our lovemaking.
‘Yes, but what if it goes wrong?’
‘What if it doesn’t? What if you and I are meant to be? Have you ever thought about that?’
