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“He seemed concerned I might not act on the evidence he offered, so he politely reminded me that in my campaign platform I promised that when I fight for equality, I don’t forget the marginalized or stigmatized. I can only imagine he got that information from you. He also handed me a copy of a position paper I wrote five years ago.” The DA’s normally steely gaze softened. “Do you want to tell her the rest?”
Josh took both of Clara’s hands in his. “I asked Toni to consider allowing you back on the campaign team. I told her you knew how to turn things around. You did it for me, and if she gave you another chance, you would do the same for her.”
Clara fanned herself. “May I sit down?”
Josh helped her to a chair.
“Are you sure about this?” She couldn’t believe the risk the DA was willing to take.
Toni turned to her aunt. “You’re in charge of my PR. Do you think bringing a case against Black Hat would be enough to own the election news cycle?”
“Let’s see. It’s got sex. Money. Power.” Jill ticked off the words on her fingers and smiled. “Ye
ah. That should work.”
“Well, Clara, what do you say? You up for it?” Toni smirked.
Clara turned to her aunt. Jill was one of the strongest and best women she knew. She’d taken a chance on Clara, no questions asked, even after everything the Wheatons had put her through. Jill had held on to her convictions for an admirably long time. Had fought for them not with weapons but with stalwart silence, accepting her family’s shunning with more grace than they deserved. She’d paid for her choices, for her freedom, and the soft lines around her eyes marked the duration of her sentence.
Jill had taught her a lot this summer, but Clara didn’t want to turn into her. The Wheatons had weathered countless scandals. It was time they learned how to forgive themselves. “I’ll come back. But you have to come home with me to Greenwich for Christmas.”
Her aunt’s eyebrows shot up.
“We can face the music together. Two black sheep returned to the flock.” Clara held her breath as she waited for an answer. She was determined that her family wouldn’t shut the door on her, but it would be easier if she had Jill at her side. The Wheatons should be proud of both of them. Neither had done something a little PR couldn’t fix.
“I’m in.” Jill wrapped Clara in a hug. “Proud of you,” she whispered in her ear.
“We might not be able to keep your name out of the opposition’s mouth entirely,” Toni said as they pulled apart. “We’re going to need to get started immediately, and none of it will be easy. Even with the right evidence, Pruitt will hire the best defense attorney money can buy. He’ll outspend us in every way, including public relations.”
“Then let’s get to work.” Jill winked as she ushered Toni out of the conference room.
As soon as they were alone, Clara turned to Josh. “I can’t believe you did this.” A lawsuit was more than taunting Pruitt. Much more than Shameless’s tiny, quiet rebellion. Going to trial, drawing the spotlight, it all jeopardized his role within the adult entertainment community. Based on what he’d told her before, many people in the industry would see him as an opportunist at best and a traitor at worst.
Growing up, Clara watched her parents make a lot of sacrifices out of love for their children, but never before had a man done anything like this out of love for her. Did she really deserve it?
So much of Josh felt too good to be true. After three months of telling herself, That’s not for you. Those eyes, those hands, that mouth, that kindness, that humor. None of it belongs to you and don’t you dare kid yourself. Even hearing the story from one of the most authoritative people she’d ever met felt surreal.
“I didn’t do it for you,” Josh said.
Clara’s shoulders sank. “Oh.”
“But I was able to do it because of you.”
He traced the curve of her cheek with the back of his hand. When Josh touched her he completed a circuit, so that electricity poured back and forth between their bodies, making every inch of her more alive.
“All of this feels big,” he said. “Not just how I love you, and not just Shameless, but this chance with Toni to help people I care about on a larger scale.” He spoke with his hands, the movement generating enthusiasm behind his words like propellers on a boat. “I never thought I would make a positive impact. If doing this, testifying and stuff, if that creates a safer work environment for sex workers, if it protects the industry from men like Pruitt, I don’t see that as abandoning porn, or turning traitor. This case would benefit everyone in this business who’s ever gotten taken for a ride.”
Josh rubbed the back of his neck. “And okay, maybe it is a little bit for you, Clara. But I don’t mind. Because when you left two nights ago, I realized I’d do anything in my power to show you how much you mean to me.”
Pain flashed in his eyes again. “I was stupid and scared. So sure you would reject me that I pushed you away. I wanted to point to you as proof of my own inferiority. I let society’s opinion of my worth declare me unqualified, before you got the chance. I thought if I could start by helping you get your job back that maybe you’d at least let me talk to you about the rest of it, the ‘loving you’ part.”
He pulled a folded sheet of loose-leaf paper out of his pocket. “I took the liberty of making a list of pros and cons.”
“You did?” Clara stared at the document. “That’s so romantic.”
“There are a lot of terrifying women in my life right now, but I don’t care,” Josh said. “Because when I look at you, Clara, it’s like a rabid beast inside me sits back on its haunches and sighs, Finally. But I want to make sure you’re cool with this. All of it. Before we go any further, have you spoken to your family?”
Clara closed her eyes. This question, among so many other wonderful things about this moment, showed her that Josh had listened, that he cared.
