Page 23 of Bear Outlaws


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“Listen. I really want this. But I feel like I’m taking advantage of you.”

I threw my head back and laughed, my waves spilling across my shoulders and back. Did he think I was made of glass? I survived Tim, there wasn’t anything left to do to me that hadn’t been done already. I’m a single mother, the greatest silent warrior across history. “Take advantage of me. Please. I’m tired of thinking for everyone around me. I want to just do something. To feel.” I kissed him again, but he pushed me away.

“That’s what I’m talking about. I don’t want to just be your wild oats. I care about you Jen. I want something real.” His face was tensed in concentration.

Well damn, what a buzzkill. How the hell do you define something real? And why did he need to make it all heavy and serious? I liked him a lot, but how was I supposed to know whether we had a future? I decided to deflect with humor. Grabbing my breasts, I asked, “Are you calling me fake?” I pursed my lips and began to wiggle my torso. Wes burst into laughter.

“Is that supposed to convince me to be less serious about you?” He grabbed my hips with his hands. I leaned in again for a deeper kiss. Wes responded by gently laying me down on the couch and sliding in beside me. He kissed my forehead and cheeks. I waited for him to start discussing how we were crossing into a weird territory beyond friendship, but he continued planting gentle kisses. After he finished my

face, he trailed down my neck. He moved slowly, spending time letting his lips get to know every inch of my burning skin. I tingled with anticipation. He moved up and down, leaving me guessing as to where he would touch next. I reached for his hands and pulled them into me. Cupping my breasts with his hand, he trailed his finger over my nipple, but then let go and wrapped his arms around me. He began to trace my arms and shoulders with his fingertips. My skin tingled leaving a shadow of heat behind his touch. The cacophony of physical and emotional sensations was confusing. He was hard. Very hard. I know he wants me. No one kisses their friends like this. It was more than play. The urgency I felt was unlike anything else, but it wasn’t met with his response. Tim and I would rip each other’s clothes off. Our sex never lasted long, but I was never in any doubt of Tim’s desire. He always needed to have me instantly, wherever we were. This was different. Wes wasn’t in a rush. We were still as dressed as we were when we started. Get out of your head. Be in the moment. There is a sexy man with his lips and hands all over you. Why are you analyzing it? Enjoy it. Let go. You’re not with Tim. Nothing will ever be like that again. A pang of want and pain ripped through my chest at once. Tim was a full-on prick, but this was moving on. Forward. And I was without him. The girls were never going to have their father in their lives full-time. From now on, I was searching for their stepdad. Wes lifted his eyes towards me filled with concern.

“Where did you go?”

“I’m sorry. Is it weird for me to say, ‘this is weird?’”

Wes’s face clouded. “What do you mean weird?” He sat up a bit.

I touched his cheek. “That’s not what I mean. I’m sorry. This is awkward. This is not the time and I’m talking too much. For some reason, I’m really nervous. I keep thinking about Tim.”

Wes scooted further away from me.

“See I’m saying the wrong thing. Please keep kissing me. I was enjoying it.”

“Apparently not enough.” He crossed his arms in a toddler-like gesture. It was almost adorable except he looked furious.

“I wish I didn’t say anything.” The air was thick and charged. It felt hot and cloudy like before a summer storm.

“Me too.”

I studied Wes’s face. He appeared to be in pain. Did I have the capacity to hurt his feelings so badly?

“Listen, I’ve got a lot of things running through my head. Being single is new and especially a single mother. I haven’t dated much since I left Tim and even when I was dating, I never felt like it was for real. This feels like I’m moving on and I was only thinking about how momentous an occasion this is. With everything I’ve been through and all. It feels big.”

Wes raised his eyebrow and looked at me sideways. I caught the joke and smiled. “It feels really big. So big I need it now.”

He leaned over and kissed me. “I can’t imagine there being a time where I can stay mad at you.”

“Well, give me some time to work on it.”

He wrapped his fingers around my chin and pulled my face towards his. When our lips touched this time, my mind was finally quiet.

Chapter 20

Frank

The waves crash up on shore as a storm approaches. The dark water churns as the waves pound the shore. My feet sink into the cool white sand. I’ve spent my whole life looking for a woman like her. And now I’ve found her. My whole life has been a straight line down a dusty highway careening one hundred miles an hour towards this very place in time. My only companions in life have been my brothers. My only friends. And enemies. We were everything to each other. Nothing has ever come between us. Until now.

Even as a triplet, I’ve never felt like I belonged to my family. It was more like I owed loyalty. Ownership and guilt. My love for my brothers was held together with tape and chicken wire. Our mother gave up on life not long after our birth. When our father realized what was involved with raising three boys only minutes apart, he decided to join another pack instead of forging his own. His death has freed us of his actions, but not the painful memories of youth in flux. Perhaps that’s why Jared’s need for control is…overgrown. A wave crashed over my ankle; the biting cold in stark contrast to the warm air heavy with moisture. The water here is usually calm. The storm coming in was new. It has to be her. Her. She can’t see me yet. Jen is looking out into the sea, clutching sand in her fists. She is close enough to the surf to get wet, but far enough to avoid getting knocked over. At least for now. The tide’s coming in.

It takes a brave man to admit he’s in love. I’ve always thought I was brave. Until her soul gripped my heart and refused to relinquish control. Jen tossed her head back and laughed. She has a marvelous musical laugh. It shakes her whole body. I was going to kiss her. Picking up the pace, I walked towards my goddess. Fear of belonging to someone always freaked me out. A mate was never something I got excited about. Although it wasn’t strange for someone who was abandoned in youth by both of their parents. Plenty of therapists repeated that sentiment growing up. But there was something about the water that always calmed me, grounded me. No matter where we moved, how many times we changed houses, I always found my way to the water. When we were in high school, we got shipped off to Ohio. After a week, I pleaded with Jared to get us out. A week later, he hot-wired a car and we set off for California. It was different after that. The system forgot us and we moved on. I was close enough to smell Jen’s hair now. Strands of it billowed behind her. Reaching my arm from behind her, I envelop her in a bear hug. She laughs and kisses me deeply. Our lips meet in a familiar dance. Her dress was hiked up and was covered in sand. Her bare legs were smooth and milky white. With my free hand, I slid my hand underneath the thin triangles of fabric straining against her heavy breasts. Jen usually wears a bra, so the thought of her unrestrained breasts made me immediately hard. I pulled her thin straps down over her shoulders exposing her full breasts. Cupping one in each hand, I lightly pinched her nipples. They hardened beneath my fingers. I leaned back and lowered us onto the sand. Gently placing her on her back, I rolled over and began licking her taut nipple. The swell of her belly made me realize. She was carrying a child and it was mine.

Using my other hand, I spread her luscious thighs. Tugging gently, I pulled her dress up. When my fingers grazed her bare pussy, an electric shock went through my body. Since when did she stop wearing panties? My cock was throbbing now, begging to be let out. I moved between her thighs and pushed the skirt of her dress out of the way. I grabbed her hips with my hands and pulled her towards me. As soon as my tongue touched her clit, Jen began to groan. Her noise was primal and from her soul. I wanted to make her come first, but I couldn’t wait anymore. I lifted myself off the ground and pulled down my pants. She reached up at me with her arms and her legs open.

“I need you now.” Her eyes were tranquil, but full of desire. Without giving it another thought, I plunged into her as deeply as I could. Pinning her hands down in the sand, I slammed myself in and out of her. Her wetness dripped between us. The orgasm came from my very depths. As I came, I grabbed for Jen and buried my face in her chest.

When I opened my eyes, I was staring at the cool, white ceiling of my bedroom. A familiar stickiness covered my lap. I groaned, disappointed. Of course, it was too good to be true. A loud knock on the door turned my stomach upside down.

“Frank, get up. I need you. Jen’s in trouble.”

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