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Sierra’s eyes flash, and she looks down into the depths of her black coffee. She chuckles, “Guess I’m not all that bad to look at in a swimsuit after all.”
She’s not getting it. So I’m going to be straight with her, throwing all caution to the wind. I’m still not interested in being her vacation fling. I don’t know what this is between us, but it’s real, no matter how I try to avoid it. “No,” I say. “I meant the second I met you on the tarmac. That’s when I knew I liked you. That’s the first time I wanted to kiss you. You asking didn’t matter; it was going to happen. What does matter now is what do we do about this?”
With wide, scared, and curious eyes, she rasps, “Do about what?”
“About the fact that I can’t stop thinking about you. About the fact that I try to avoid you, to be professional, not letting myself get tangled up in a fling with you because you’re leaving the island in a week and a half.”
A mischievous smile spreads across her face. “That all sounds like a personal problem for you to figure out because it’s causing you to send mixed signals.”
“How so?”
“Well,” Sierra explains, fidgeting with the handle of her coffee mug. “I thought you weren’t into me. You kissed me yesterday, and then you stopped. So I thought we would be friends, and I was trying to be okay with that. So …You mean you liked the kiss?”
I’m about ready to knock over the table and grab her by the shoulders. “Sierra, are you for real? I…just…I mean… God, I’ve never been this tongue-tied around anyone. You mess with my head, and I don’t know what to say, and when I do talk, I say the wrong things. Fuck. I’m waking up in the middle of the night, after having dreams that I’m asking you to—” I cut myself off, but her eyes beckon me to continue.
“Asking me to what, Austin?”
It’s too soon to admit this … but fuck it. It’s the island magic, making me blurt it out. “To let me be the one to put a baby in you.”
Sierra stares back at me, blinking.
People at a nearby table turn and smirk. Another table titters. Someone gasps and drops a fork, and still others laugh.
She folds her hands flat on the table and looks down at her fingers.
I scrape my hands over my scalp. “Well, that could’ve been phrased better.”
Chapter Ten
Sierra
I spent the last 12 hours thinking he wasn’t into me, but he is?
I whisper though it’s futile because everyone around us at Mello Toast is listening. “Are these just wild, wet dreams, or is there more to it than that?”
Austin shakes his head, blows out a breath, and darts his eyes to the blue sky above as if seeking answers.
“Yes.”
“That’s not an answer,” I say.
“It means yes to both. I can’t believe I’m saying it, but you broke me, Sierra. Every time I close my eyes, I’m making you pregnant. I’m sorry. I can’t keep my distance when we’re together. You put inappropriate thoughts into my head. So we’ve either got to get this out of our system, or we’ve got to explore this thing between us.”
“I gotta go,” I say, standing and backing away.
“For how long?” Austin’s Adam’s apple bobs up and down. I hate that I’m making him feel anxious, but what does he expect?
I look at him over my shoulder as I walk away. “A woman takes as long as she needs. I’ll need to make a pro/con list.”
It’s true. I do need to make a pro/con list. Because what Austin has said to me is preposterous.
Having fun is one thing. A lifelong commitment around a shared child is another.
But then again: did he actually ask me, or was he simply telling me about his dreams? His only clear suggestion was to “explore this thing between us.”
I tap my marker against my lip because it helps me think. Does his suggestion fit the mission of Babymoon or not?
“That legal pad is going to get soaked.”
