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“I found out a couple of weeks ago. Obviously, this wasn’t supposed to happen and I understand if you have regrets.”
For the first time since I’ve known him, Carlton is speechless, and I trudge on, grateful that he’s too stunned to speak because it gives me the space to continue.
“And I realize that this is shocking, not just because we reconnected, but actually because … well, I’d been planning to break your heart.”
At this, Carlton stares at me.
“You what?” he asks in a low voice.
I press on, hating myself for all that I have to say but knowing that he deserves the truth.
“When we were kids, you dismissed me. You bullied me, you made me feel like I was nothing. And when we accidentally saw each other again after so many years, I knew that I wanted to make you pay. Tit for that, and all that.”
Unable to be so close to him any longer, it’s my turn to stand up and pace my small living room area. “I didn’t mean for things to get so complicated,” I admit. “In fact, I thought I’d just make you fall in love with me, do some stupid shit to ruthlessly break your heart, and then I’d be able to waltz out of your life. That way, you’d know what it felt like to be the one left hurting, and I’d finally be able to move on from you.”
Hot tears begin to spill down my cheeks as I speak. I don’t even try to control them.
“But then, in the middle of it all, I started to fall for you, and it wasn’t just the fancy dates or the gifts. No,” I shake my head and swipe at my tears. “You are kind, and funny, and generous. And instead, like the idiot that I am, I fell in love with you again, twelve years later.”
At this point, Carlton stands up, but he doesn’t make a move to approach me. He eyes me carefully, letting me continue my impassioned speech from a slight distance.
“And the topper, the real cherry on top, is that I’m pregnant with your baby now.”
The soft tears that had been seeping from my eyes suddenly become intense, heaving sobs. I drop my head into my hands and weep fully, no longer caring nor able to control my emotions.
I feel Carlton’s large, muscular arms encircle me as he presses my head against his broad chest. As I sob uncontrollably in his embrace, he makes shushing sounds and places light kisses on top of my head.
After a few minutes of merely holding one another, I step back. I place a hand on Carlton’s chest then look up at him through bleary eyes.
“It’s lame, isn’t it?”
He huffs a laugh that’s more of a croak than anything.
“So you were going to break my heart,” he says. I nod, and then let out a big hiccup.
“I was. I had some hare-brained scheme about showing everyone your crown jewels and embarrassing you—”
At that, Carlton pulls back, squinting.
“What the fuck?”
I wave my hands in a panic.
“Well, I have all these sexts from you, and then I videotaped us having sex once, and you know you’re huge. Like your cock hangs down to your knee, so I was going to show everyone at Dissidence and Concord—”
He lets out a bark of a laugh then.
“Really. You were going to embarrass me by showing our co-workers my enormous cock.”
I bite my lip, realizing how stupid it sounds.
“Yes,” I say in a small voice. “But then I realized I didn’t want anyone to see your cock but me, and –”
Carlton cuts me off again, his eyes amused.
“Honey, you can’t embarrass me like that. I mean, if I were pea-sized with a micro-dick, then yeah, maybe. But sweetheart, I’m nine inches and as thick as your fist. Hell, men use penis pumps to try to get themselves to my size.”
“I never said my plan made sense,” I say in a faint voice. “And I figured that out, once I really thought it through.”
The gorgeous man looks at me, his blue eyes dancing.
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t go through with it then,” he drawls. “It would have made quite the movie for our team. I’m sure some of them would be choking on their popcorn in fact.”
With that, we both laugh a little, the tension in the room easing a bit.
“So you’re not mad?” I venture.
His blue eyes flare.
“Oh, I’m mad, baby girl, just not in the way you think. You’ll pay for this honey, but in a way you can’t anticipate.”
A delicious shiver goes down my spine.
“Really?”
His blue eyes flare.
“Hell yeah,” he growls. “Imagine that. A dirty movie for our co-workers to watch. Shit, what have I gotten myself into?”
But then, I take a deep, shuddering breath.
“I know,” is my quiet reply. “But I have something else to reveal too.”
