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“No, I just find it hard to believe that you found somebody good enough to say yes to.”
He didn't say anything else, and I wasn't quite sure what he meant, so I didn't get into it any further. “Well, I did, and it was a mistake. He is now about to have a baby with his girlfriend, and the divorce will be finalized next week. I thought that I could stay in the city and just move on, but seeing them together all the time made things even more complicated. Now here I am, back in Jericho, right where I didn't want to be.”
Jeff just whistled. “I can't believe it. You've been married and divorced, and I might have dated two girls for more than a month.”
“What about Nadia?” That was who he was dating when I had left, and he said that the two of them had broken up not too long after. It was hard to see Jeff alone on this mountain, but I think he felt contentment from it. He had always been someone who overthought just a little bit too much. I was the same way and that's why we got along so well. While my brother would be throwing a party at our house when our parents were away, Jeff and I would find each other in the backyard, both trying to get away from the noise and the chaos.
“Trust me, if your relationships are going to end up like mine, you are probably better off. Sometimes I wish I never would have met my ex-husband. I guess I should see the bright side, lessons learned, but at the end of the day, it just kind of sucks.”
“The guy was an idiot.”
“Obviously,” I said joking, but only half so. I had come to the same conclusion, that he was an idiot.
“Nothing turned out the way we used to talk about it would, did it?”
“Some of it. You made it to the city, worked in skyscrapers.”
“Neither one of us got the things that we wanted so badly. They didn’t work out in the end.”
“Do you wish that you’d never left?”
Jeff sounded nostalgic. I tried to play out what would have happened if I would have stayed here in Jericho, and I still could honestly answer. I probably would be a completely different person. Things between me and Jeff wouldn’t be any different.
“I don't know. It's easy to say yes and I wish I had stayed, but then again, maybe it needed to happen. I had a few lessons to learn, I suppose.”
“Hard way to learn,” Jeff pointed out.
I shrugged, agreeing wholeheartedly. “Seems like all the good lessons are damn hard.”
“Yeah, when you left, I got a reality check. I didn't have anybody to talk to.”
“You got my brother.”
“Yeah, and you know we’ve been friends forever, but we don’t talk like we used to. You and I talked about everything. I’ve never found anyone else to make me feel so comfortable to share secrets with. I trust you more than I do my best friend.”
That little confession probably warmed me all the way to my toes and for a moment, there was heat in the air, electricity that threatened to overwhelm me if I allowed it to. I should finish the circuit, Jeff being it.
Instead, I walked around his place and asked him questions about pictures and anything really to get his mind off the past and us. I didn't want to feel this connection with Jeff, if I was being honest with myself. I'd never wanted to feel it. It was problematic. It scared me and it just refused to go away, just like the feelings I still had for him.
6
Jeff
Beatrice had a couple of glasses and she made me take her to the pond. I thought that she had forgotten, but she was probably thinking about that the whole time. Beatrice really was a fish and was happiest in a body of water.
I was feeling pretty good, Beatrice was back in town, and besides the few awkward moments, it was just like before. I had forgotten how much I enjoyed her company. I wasn't lying to her either, there was nobody else I had met that was like her.
Everything was good, and we had a good conversation. Then, everything went downhill very quickly. She took her shirt off to go swimming and I saw the bikini underneath. I had been expecting it, I knew what was going to happen, but seeing her that way, the perfection in her body, it was hard not to focus on. She had certainly grown up since last time I had seen her. Her skin was flawless, curves for days, and she had the most beautiful mischievous smile on her face.
“How is it?” I asked her about the water.
Beatrice shook her head. “Why don't you come in and tell me?”
I knew that she was going to try to get me into the water, but it didn't seem like the best idea ever. If I got in with her, things would not turn out the way they were supposed to. I was absolutely smitten with her.
“How about I just wait out here and we can still talk if you want?” I suggested.
Beatrice scoffed, not taking the suggestion very well. “I never knew you to be a watcher. I always thought that you wanted to participate.”
