AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Well… n—”
“Then you have absolutely no reason to be here.” I took a step closer to her, tilting my head to make sure only she could read my lips and hear me. “You’re testing my patience, Caroline. I’ve given true merit to your grief, even your anger, but I’m tired of you directing both to me. Leave, now, and don’t come back. Otherwise, you’re going to meet the real Hosea Thompson, and he’s not as nice as I’ve been to you.”
Lifting my head, I waved two fingers and motioned for the security guards waiting by the door to come to me.
“Let this be the last time she receives entry to the Tower without being a paying guest.”
As I walked away, I inhaled what I hoped would be a deep, calming breath. If Caroline wanted to come here and raise hell, her ass was going to have to pay for it.
Seventeen
Cartier
I was so grateful for Hosea. He helped me get my mind right after leaving the police station. We ended up going to Moondance Grill for an early dinner, and it was honestly hard for me to keep my eyes off him. It was early October, so the weather was perfect. Not too hot nor too cool. Instead of his usual suit and tie, Hosea dressed in a tan V-neck t-shirt that looked so damn good against his pecan brown hued skin. The olive-green slacks he wore were tailor made, showing what those days and nights in the gym had done for his physique.
We both were a bit outdoorsy when it came to our favorite recreational activities, so I happily agreed to take a short walk after dinner before grabbing coffee. Ever since I’d learned both things helped keep bloating to a minimum, I tried to incorporate both into my after-dinner routine on my off days. Working at the bar back in Cali kept me on my feet enough. I loved Memphis, but Los Angeles had things about it that made it feel like home—mostly my brother.
Saint was on the road a lot, but when he wasn’t, I enjoyed the time we were able to spend together. Honestly, that was the only thing pulling me back to Cali. That, and my apartment. I wasn’t sure I would return to LASC to advise, but I wouldn’t mind going back to the bar and grill to work.
As Hosea walked over to our table holding our lattes, I smiled.
“Thank you, bab—Zay.”
He chuckled softly but didn’t acknowledge my slip of the tongue as he set my cinnamon caramel latte in front of me.
I liked how alike, yet different, we were.
We both had different upbringings and relationships with our parents. He was really close to his, I wasn’t as close to my mother. We both were super close to our siblings and friends. I was a Cancer baby, thirty-three years old, and Hosea was thirty-five and a Scorpio. I could honestly say we balanced each other out well. He handled my moods and thought process better than most men. He was patient with me, which meant a lot.
“It’s so beautiful out today,” I complimented, closing my eyes as the wind blew.
We’d sat outside of Fifer’s, enjoying our coffee, and the weather was absolutely perfect for it.
“The weather will always be beautiful if you’re out in it.”
At the sound of his compliment, I opened my eyes with a smile. “What are we doing, Hosea? Honestly? I think it’s safe to say we’ve blurred the line between friendship and lovers, but we haven’t crossed it all the way yet. Are we just… straddling it? And if so, to what end?”
He took a sip of his latte before taking my hand into his on top of the table.
“I can admit that I’ve been seeing you as more than just a friend lately. I was always attracted to you, but I didn’t allow myself to have feelings for you because I didn’t think I was worthy of you.”
I laughed. “It’s only funny because I was attracted to you, too, but I didn’t think I was your type. I didn’t feel like I fit in with Saint and his friends, you know? I do now, but back then, I was still young and sheltered and in my shell. And you would be with…” My head shook as I thought back on those times. “These beautiful, vibrant women. Like, even if they were quiet or not drinking and shit, their auras were always loud and bright. It’s like you attracted the prettiest souls.” My smile dropped and eyes watered. “Mine was tortured. Longing. Feeling… abandoned.” I released a bitter chuckle as my lips trembled. Inhaling a shaky breath, I wiped my face of its tears before returning my hand to his. “I just never thought we would get to this point. Now that we are, it’s scaring the hell out of me.”
Hosea smiled as his own eyes watered, but he wouldn’t drop a tear. My emotions always made him emotional, but he was always my strength. He had to be, dealing with a big crybaby like me.
“I don’t think I attracted pretty, vibrant souls; I think I sought them out because mine was dark. My relationship with my family has always been great, but that’s mainly because my parents schedules are so hectic, we had no choice but to make the most of our time together. There was no room for arguing and shit or not taking full advantage of our time together because it was so limited. I felt very alone, and I think that’s why I cling to my crew the way I do. We all have issues that being together covers in love. I wouldn’t necessarily say I felt abandoned by my parents because I knew they were doing what they had to do, but I do, I did, feel abandoned by Mariah. I think that’s why we’re connecting the way we are now. We have a common need because of that abandonment and rejection, but I fear the result because we’re handling it differently.”
“You’re right,” I agreed. “I think my abandonment causes me to cling while yours causes you to push away.”
“Typically. It’s different with you. I want to cling to you, but I don’t want to tie our souls together and they be ripped apart when you leave.”
“Are you saying my choice determines what happens between us?”
“Yeah,” he replied simply. “You’ve made it very clear that you want to go back to L.A. when all of this is over, and I can’t do a long-distance relationship. I would go crazy not having you close.”
“Quality time is your love language, huh?”
“Yeah, and my sensory preference is touch. So if I can’t be near you and touch you, I won’t feel loved.”
