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“You’re totally punching him in the dick on purpose this time if he fires us,” Callie informs me, closing the door to the metal cage and spinning the balls around again. “Speaking of sixty-nine, let’s go over those kiss details again, and then we can discuss the best way to proceed with this friendly fling.”
“I’m not proceeding with anything. It’s a stupid idea, and I’m officially done talking about the kiss.”
“He did theback of the neck grab? Jesus, Sid, that’s like top-tier kissing technique right there,” Callie grunts through her exertion.
“Men really do not utilize that move enough to get laid,” I pant, my arms starting to burn as we make our way through the grass.
“Honestly. Someone should put out a PSA or something. I had to teach that move to Marcus by showing him a video online. It took him seven tries before he got it down smoothly.”
“Oh my God, you can’t keep dropping your end!” I whisper-yell at Callie when she pauses in the grass. “I’m carrying the heaviest part. Come on!”
“Sorry! You can’t just casually bring up a kiss neck-grab like that and expect me to be able to focus on what I’m doing.”
Ginger lets out a little snore, and Callie and I remain completely still for a few seconds, holding our breaths while we stare down at her. When she doesn’t make another sound, we go back to what we were doing.
“You know, when I told you in sixth grade that I was your ride-or-die best friend and the one you should call when you need help moving a body, I didn’t mean that literally,” Callie whispers as she gently grabs Ginger’s feet again, and I lift my arms higher that are shoved under Ginger’s armpits so we can continue hobbling to our destination.
“Do you think we gave them enough Benadryl?” I whisper back as we gently put Ginger’s passed-out body next to my sister’s, right at the base of the giant, light-up pumpkin in the middle of town square.
I’ve been too preoccupied by what’s going on with Ford to get Penny and Ginger back for my shoes. I definitely needed the distraction tonight, after a day of giving myself mental whiplash and with Ford still nowhere to be found. Talking about this isn’t exactly helping me stay distracted, but it’s better than worrying that Ireallypissed Ford off by walking away from him last night.
“They look so sweet and innocent when they’re asleep, don’t they?” Callie muses quietly.
“I will fucking cut you,” Penny murmurs before rolling over in the grass away from Ginger and curling up into a ball.
I should feel guilty I bribed the girls into coming over to my house under the ruse of celebrating the closing of their most recent cheating case. I made them a full spread of their favorite breakfast dishes at ten o’clock at night, paired with an apple bourbon fizz drink I wanted them to “test out” for the bar. I did not feel guilty at all when they complained their drinks tasted like shit even while they guzzled them down and then proceeded to pass out face-down on my kitchen table, all while slurring about how stupid Ford is for always fixing things for me.
The only thing I felt guilty about was not calling Ford and asking him to help.
After that, it was just a matter of loading them in my car and stopping by the bar to borrow two flatbed dollies. We pushed them through town after everything quieted down and most people were asleep, and we’ve now deposited them in the middle of town square in their underwear, with their bodies wrapped in toilet paper like mummies.
“Trick or Treat, you little shits,” I whisper, blowing them both a kiss as Callie and I start backing away.
“All right, we can’t let the rest of this night go to waste, since you switched your schedule with Pammy so you didn’t have to work, and my mother-in-law took Casper for the night,” Callie states, wrapping her hand around my elbow as we walk back to the sidewalk where we left the dollies. “Marcus still has at least another hour and a half closing up before he’ll be home. Let’s go back to my place, open a bottle of wine, and continue discussing the kiss and the fling.”
“We’ve discussed this enough for one day.”
“This isn’t about you, Sidney,God!Stop being so selfish,” she complains.
Chapter 12
Ford
“You act like this is our firstrodeo.”
“Amanda Shadoan heardit from Denise Barker, who heard it from Heidi Brakken, who heard it from Nicky while she was selling T-shirts outside the general store. Amanda spilled the tea when she came into the bar tonight, and all I have to say is…how dare you?”
With a sigh, I hold my phone between my cheek and my shoulder, grabbing the boxes I brought with me out of my truck. “The only reason I picked up your call is because I thought there was an emergency at the bar.”
Marcus gasps dramatically through the phone. I roll my eyes as I kick the door of my SUV closed with my foot and start walking up the driveway, even though I’m secretly happy as shit right now.
“I cannot believe I had to hear it through the Harvest Grove gossip line that you kissed Sidney! After everything I’ve done for you. The blood, the sweat, the tears, and the nightmares of spending the rest of my life dickless after my wife finds out. How. Dare. You.”
“Are you finished?”
Still holding my phone with my shoulder, I flip around the keys on my keyring until I find the one I’m looking for as I walk up to Sidney’s side door that leads into her laundry room.
“Yep. That about covers it. Sooo, give me all the deets, and leave nothing out.” I can actually see him resting his chin in his hands and his elbows on the bar like a teenage girl. “Did you do that neck grab move? Works like a charm. I pretty much invented it. Been doing it long before it was cool, all on my own, with no help from anyone. Tell me everything. I just finished cashing out the drawer and restocking the coolers, so I’m all yours.”
