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Twenty-Eight
Connor
When the limo pulls away, I step out of the shadows as Thea walks up to her door.
“I’m sorry.”
She jumps, hissing out a strangled, “Jesus, Connor.” Looking me up and down, she frowns. “I’m glad you’re not out doing something stupid. I was really worried about you.”
My breath punches from me. I go off like that and she’s worried about me?
I’m such an asshole. My girlfriend is right in front of me, stunning in the moonlight in her pink dress and white wool coat. Tonight was the one thing she asked me for and instead of making her night magical, I was on the defensive. I was too focused on the plan to break into Coleman’s house in a few days that I pushed her away. It was only for her protection, but now that I see the sadness in her eyes I know I fucked up.
With a sigh, I scrub a hand through my hair. “Sorry. I messed it all up. I didn’t mean to ruin the night. I had to get out of there, or I was going to put my fist through the wall, or…” I shake my head.
She doesn’t want to hear about me punching Coleman.
I hold out my hand, heart hammering in my chest. “It doesn’t matter. I was wrong and I shouldn’t have left you alone. I want to show you something to make it up to you. Will you come with me for a drive?”
Thea studies me for a long beat where I think she’s going to refuse. She should, after the way I treated her.
“Where are we going?”
I swallow in relief.
“I want to take you to a special place. It’s where I go when I need to cool my head.”
The wariness in Thea’s gaze softens. “Promise me one thing.”
“Anything.”
“You don’t dictate my life. You can’t tell me what I can and can’t do. You know why I hate that.”
My gaze cuts away. I do know. She’s told me about her issues with her mom being controlling and conservative. I can’t help that in my effort to protect her from the threat Coleman poses, and from the mysterious hacking group using her as incentive to do what they told me to, I became forceful with her.
Controlling is the only way I know how to be. Without it, I turn wild. Learning to give that up when I know I’m keeping her safe is a daily challenge.
She takes my hand in both of hers, her eyes bouncing between mine when they fly back to her. The sight of her causes a pang in my chest with her flower crown, those big doe eyes, and the tilt of her pouty lips.
I open my mouth to swear to her.
But I can’t.
The only choice I have is to lie, and that frustrates the hell out of me. I don’t want to lie to her, but I can’t freak her out with this, either. Bile rises in my throat, keeping me from betraying her.
This is all for her own good. I can’t stop the plan now. Once I get into Coleman’s house with Devlin and Blair’s help, then this will all be over. I’ll give Thea anything she wants afterwards, even if she demands I walk away from her.
It’ll kill me to leave her when I’m in love with her, but this will be the last promise to her I ever break.
Thea isn’t the meek girl I used to think she was, but I won’t hurt her by scaring her with the monsters waiting to take a bite out of her.
It’s a huge risk, putting everything between us in jeopardy.
Instead of the promise she wants, I aim for a little honesty, because it’s what she’ll listen to.
“I can’t promise you that yet.” At Thea’s crumbling expression, I rush the rest of my explanation out. “I want to, baby. So badly. But this is really big. Bigger than dirty politics and cover ups. I swear to you, I would never control you like she tries to. I know you’re strong and capable of making your own choices. Please. Trust me?”
“We’ve had good communication to solve our issues before,” Thea murmurs. “I trust you with my secrets, and you trust me with yours. So why are you keeping something from me?”
