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“Are you calling to apologize?” she answered. “Because I don’t want to talk to you unless you’re going to tell me that you’re sorry.”
“I am sorry, Shell.”
“I’m listening.”
“I am sorry for being so short with you last night. You know how I get when it comes to my mom, and I can’t help that reaction. I’m sorry that you had to deal with her yesterday. I know you felt like you were being stalked, and it freaked you out.”
“You sound like shit. Are you sick?”
“No. I had a rough night.”
“You’ve been having a lot of those lately, haven’t you?”
“Please. Not you, too.”
“Why, has Chase said something to you about your drinking?”
“He’s been hinting at it.”
“He sees it. I’m not even there and I see it. This isn’t like you. Is it because of the new friends you’ve made?”
“No,” I whined, rubbing my head.
“So then what the hell is going on with you? You’re spiraling.”
“I’m not spiraling. I called to apologize, you know. Not for a lecture.”
“I’m not giving you a lecture. I’m asking you to talk to me. Every time I call, you glaze over everything and tell me how it’s all good and fine. I know you better than anyone else, in case you’ve forgotten, and I know you are not okay. I just need you to tell me why.”
“I don’t know why!” My voice strained to get louder.
“Merr, maybe you need to come home.”
“I can’t come home. Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Why not? You’re not a prisoner. You’re clearly going through something, and you’re going through it alone. I know you have Chase, but he isn’t exactly around very often.”
“If I leave, Chase will want to leave with me. That was the deal. I can’t make him throw everything away just because I want to come home. Not after everything he’s done for me.”
“Everything he has done for you is because he fell in love with you. You don’t owe him for the rest of your lives. You have worried about everyone else your entire life. You need to worry about yourself for once. Chase is a big boy. He can handle himself. You’re not responsible for him.”
“No. I can’t ruin this for him. I’m going to get a handle on things. It will all be okay.”
“Not when you’re working in a bar every night. That’s not exactly the best environment for you to be in, clearly.”
“This is coming from the one who told me to have a drink to take the edge off.”
“Oh, so this is all my fault now? I turned you into an alcoholic because I told you to have one drink?”
“I’m hardly an alcoholic. There are people in that bar every night, doing the same thing I’m doing. You forget, I’ve seen you wasted more times than I can count.”
“Maybe I should come out there sooner. Another few weeks seems so far away.”
“No. Don’t be crazy. You have school. I’ll be fine. I promise.”
“Look, I have to get to class now. I’m going to call you back later, and we can finish this conversation.”
“Okay. I have work later tonight.”
