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“I’m going to give you some breathing room, but I’m just going to be upstairs if you want anything.”
“Okay.”
I go up and wash my face in the enormous, fancy bathroom attached to the main bedroom. Then I settle into the sitting area by the balcony to wait. It’s a beautiful view. Ocean and sand and stars. I hope Will comes up soon. We don’t have to touch if he doesn’t want to. We could just sleep in the same bed.
I hope…
A sunbeam on my face startles me awake.
It’s an early morning sunbeam, coming in through the big bedroom window at the beach house.
The throw blanket from the back of the couch is tangled around my legs, so I kick it off and sit up. Rub my hands over my face. It’s a nice couch—nicer than anything I’ve ever owned, that’s for sure—but I fell asleep in a weird position, and now my shoulders ache. Everything aches, actually. My heart most of all.
Will never came to bed last night. The blankets are untouched.
I feel hungover, but aside from the beer I had on the beach, I didn’t drink yesterday. It’s from emotions, I think, and it feels awful.
Brushing my teeth and washing my face make things a little better. I run a comb through my hair and go to find him.
He’s in the living room, right where I left him, except now he’s passed out on the couch. His face is turned toward the back and his left arm dangles off the side. His fingertips rest on an empty bottle of tequila.
He must have kept drinking until he passed out.
This is—
I don’t know what this is.
I rub my knuckles to my forehead and try to figure out how our beach vacation has gone to such a strange, painful hell.
Watching his chest rise and fall in his sleep, two things are clear. First, I understand how my brother can choose a job on the other side of the world. I understand how he can choose his career and walk away from us. Because the choice belongs to him, just like it belongs to Will. Family isn’t blood. It’s loyalty, and we can choose where ours goes.
And mine’s with him. No matter what he chooses to do with the knowledge that his mom’s alive. I hope, for everybody’s sake, that he and his brothers will be able to come out of it together.
Second, I’m a hundred percent certain that my loyaltyalsobelongs to my siblings. I’m staying with them. End of story.
I need to talk to the twins. I was hoping I could talk to Will first, but it didn’t work out that way. I don’t think this conversation can wait. Mia and Ben grew up without a mom, too. Unlike Will’s mother, ours is definitely dead. I’m not sure if they realize who came to the door yesterday, but it feels wrong to leave them in the dark. They were there when she showed up. And once they know, it could bring up some things.
I climb the stairs and lean into their bedroom, expecting to find Mia awake reading and Ben sleeping in.
Except…
Both their beds are empty.
What?
A few steps further into the room. The hoodies they tossed onto the ends of their beds last night are missing, and so are their shoes. My heart jitters. It’s a huge house. They could be anywhere. Out on the beach. In one of the many other rooms. Sitting by the pool.
I’m sure they could still be here.
Until I see the note wedged between Mia’s pillow and the headboard.
It’s her handwriting.
Dad needs help. We’re sorry. Be back soon!!
I turn and run, the note crumpling in my fist.
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