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I nodded, but didn’t say anything else. Iwouldhave done it. I might have hated myself forever and felt dead on the inside, but I would have done what my alpha expected of me.
“So now what?” he asked. “I heard you tell Kayden to have Jessica move the proposal ceremony up to tomorrow.”
“I have an idea. One that just might satisfy everyone involved…”
26
JESSICA
This proposal ceremony would be different than Holden and Kayden’s. Willow had outdone herself with the magical setting that day last year, but I wanted something designed specifically for Garrett. Something that suited him on what was supposed to be one of the most monumental moments of his life. But every flower I arranged, every candle I lit, only served to remind me of what I was losing.
Last night, he’d come to my room well after midnight, creeping in quietly and climbing into bed with me. He’d only held me in his arms, had never known I was awake, and then he’d been gone by morning. We hadn’t spoken since he told me he loved me.
My heart broke as I replayed that moment in my mind over and over again. It had been all I could think about yesterday while he was gone on his visit to Reagan’s pack lands. All I’d thought of since Kayden came to my room last night, a couple of hours before Garrett had snuck in to tell me that he wanted the proposal ceremony moved up to today.
Perhaps it was best that I’d pretended to be asleep last night. I didn’t want to hear about how his date went or why he’d decided to jump to the end of the Contention without even consulting me. Though it certainly wasn’t out of character—he’d been ignoring rules and making his own decisions the entire time.
I stepped back to take in my work so far in the northeast garden, not so far from where Garrett and I had dinner that night so many weeks ago before the Contention had even begun. This was by far the prettiest garden on the grounds—trees and hedges created a natural path that wound through bright pink and purple flowers. The path opened up into a small clearing, where wisteria vines sprung up and over to create a natural shelter. The wisteria was in full bloom, dappled sunlight filtering through to the soft grass below. The garden was so lush and gorgeous this time of year that I hardly needed to add to its natural beauty, but I’d still spent hours fussing with the details, wanting everything to be absolutely perfect.
The sound of waves crashing in the distance, and the fresh salty breeze perfectly complemented the romantic ambiance. I couldn’t think of any better place for a proposal, and it would have been a dream come true, exactly what I wanted for myself if I were in the contestants’ shoes.
But I wasn’t. I sucked in a trembling breath and got back to work, stringing lights along the path and around the clearing. Once the sun began to set, the lights would give it an even more magical, ethereal look.
I stayed busy all day, not even breaking for lunch and refusing the help of the many assistants who’d offered because I wanted to do it myself. So, it would be absolutely perfect. Plus, I knew if I stopped, I might lose my thin grip on my composure. I couldn’t afford to have a total breakdown. Not today. I’d save it for tonight when Garrett and his new mate were off celebrating their future.
An hour before sunset, I returned to my room to change into a dress Kayden had selected for me. She’d told me last night that she knew how difficult the day would be for me and that she wanted to do anything she could to lighten my load. I appreciated it, especially when I saw the dress she’d had delivered.
It had seemed a bit much at first, considering I was only coordinating the ceremony, watching from the sidelines, but when I tried it on, I fell in love with the antique lace details. The sleeveless dress had a high neckline, though the lace was sheer everywhere except the bodice. It hugged my curves to mid-thigh, where a slit opened to reveal my legs, the fabric cascading down to a tiny train that flowed behind.
Kayden even arranged for a stylist to do my hair and makeup, something I honestly didn’t feel like messing with after a long day of work. Just as the stylist was finishing up, there was a knock at my door.
My heart beat faster at the irrational hope that it was Garrett, and my shoulders drooped when Kayden herself walked in.
“Don’t look so excited to see me,” she teased. “I brought you a drink.”
She handed me a champagne flute, and I noted that hers was filled with sparkling water. “To all your hard work at making this a successful event. I just snuck a peek, and you’ve really outdone yourself.”
I shrugged, taking a sip. “I just want it to be perfect for him.” I took a deep breath, my throat stinging, but I willed myself not to cry. Not after the beautiful job the stylist had done on my makeup. “We should probably get down to the garden.”
Kayden nodded. “I’ll walk with you. But I just wanted to see you before. Make sure you’re okay.”
I stood, and a smile bloomed on Kayden’s face. “Wow. You look incredible. Not sure if anyone’s going to be looking at the contestants when you’re looking like this.”
I bit my lip and turned to look in the mirror. “Is it too much?”
My reflection always surprised me when I was all dressed up, though I should be used to it by now. The makeup made my eyes pop, and my hair had been styled half-up, half-down, with large waves cascading down over my shoulders.
“No, it’s perfect,” Kayden said, finishing her glass of champagne. “Now, let’s go.”
As we approached the garden, the soft, lilting sounds of the string quartet I’d arranged drifted through the air. The scent of the flowers was light and fresh. And the lighting cast a magical glow all around.
“This is amazing,” Kayden gushed. “Maybe even better than my own proposal ceremony.”
I laughed. “Don’t say that to Willow.”
“What about me?”
My eyes widened as Willow joined us at the edge of the garden, taking it all in as guests and council members began arriving. There weren’t nearly as many people here as there had been for Kayden’s proposal, but I thought the intimate setting suited Garrett. He wouldn’t want dozens upon dozens of people watching.
