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Stephanie’s wolf dug her claws deep into Holly’s side, ripping deep gashes that gushed dark crimson blood all over the wooden floor. Holly reared up, slashing at Stephanie’s muzzle, coming terrifyingly close to her eye. I winced, clinging to Garrett’s arm as he pushed me behind him. Some injuries sustained in wolf form could not be repaired after a shift. If a wolf lost an eye, it was gone in both forms.
The challenge went on for what felt like forever, and I was shaking by the time Stephanie pinned Holly to the ground. I tensed, waiting for the fatal bite or blow, but Holly submitted at the last minute, to my relief.
Immediately, assistants surged forward, swarming the room, and I let go of Garrett, taking a deep breath and joining the fray to do my job.
“Take them both to the infirmary,” I called out. “Amber, run ahead to let the medics know they’re on the way.”
A flurry of activity ensued, and within moments, the women were being carried away, both shifted back to human form. I followed behind, my nerves on edge until Garrett appeared beside me once more.
He rested a hand on my lower back, guiding me down the hallway, and a sense of calm came over me. Just having him near seemed to steady me, and helped me think more clearly. When had that happened? And what would I do when I no longer had him by my side? How would I handle watching him comfort another woman?
The thought persisted as we entered the infirmary. Somehow, I’d come to depend on him without even realizing it. These past two days without him had been miserable, and it felt perfectly natural to have him here with me now. This had become even more dangerous than I’d realized.
As soon as Margie and an assistant medic began working on the girls, assuring me they’d be fine, I excused myself, practically running away from Garrett. Unsure how in the world I would be able to move on once he did.
Back in my suite, I paced the length of the living area. This wasn’t good. I was becoming way too attached to Garrett. My happiness way too dependent on him. Yet I knew we couldn’t be together.
I was setting myself up for heartbreak. Putting distance between us was supposed to have helped, but it had only made me miss him.
And the realization sat heavily now—I would have to watch Garrett move on with another woman. I would be witness to all of it.
Even worse, I’d probably be responsible for planning his mating ceremony and who knew what else. My stomach twisted, my chest aching. How had I let this go so far?
I was past the point of being able to deny my feelings. What I had to figure out now was how to live with them.
* * *
The next morning,I resumed giving Garrett his morning briefings. I’d done a lot of hard thinking last night, and I’d come to the conclusion that I couldn’t keep avoiding him. I simply had to learn how to be around him. We would be living here on the estate together for as long as he was beta and I was part of the council—which would be many, many years.
I had to face the truth of our situation. I was going to be witness to his relationship with another woman for decades to come. The sooner I came to terms with it, the better. So I sucked it up, pulled on my big girl panties, and waltzed into his apartment, determined to remain professional and do my job to the best of my abilities.
“Good morning,” I said, flicking on a light as I entered his bedroom. It had become a routine by now, and I wondered how he would readjust to his normal life once the Contention was over and he got back to work. “Rise and shine.”
“I’m awake,” he said, though he was still lying in bed.
“Great,” I said, barely resisting the urge to fall into our old familiar banter. “We have lots to discuss.”
He sat up, the blankets falling to his lap, and I forced myself not to stare at his washboard abs, to forget what it felt like to have those corded arms wrapped around my body.
I cleared my throat. “Holly is healed enough to return home later today. That leaves us with only six more contestants. It’s time to really get serious, Garrett. We need to be strategic about the final three.”
He nodded, running a hand through his hair, his muscles bunching with the movement. I pretended not to notice, though my body tingled with awareness.
“I’ve been thinking about it a lot,” he said. “When is the next competition scheduled? Honestly, I’m ready to just get it all over with now.”
I blinked, my throat constricted, and I had to swallow before speaking. “You weren’t so eager just a few days ago. Does that mean you’ve already made your decision? You’re going with Reagan?”
He stared at me for a moment that felt like an eternity, his eyes clouded, his jaw ticking. Then he sighed. “I don’t think there’s any better option. This is the best solution that could come out of all this.”
“Is it?” My voice was strained, my chest aching. He’d chosen his mate then, and the rest was just a formality.
“Yeah, Jess. It is.” He scraped his hands over his face. “If this is what I have to do for Holden and me to advance our plans, then Reagan is the best choice. It’s a political move that will work in our favor.”
“You didn’t even give any of the girls a real chance, though, Garrett,” I protested. “That’s not how this was all supposed to go down. You never even tried, not really.”
He scoffed, leaning forward, his eyes pinning me in place with their intensity. “Of course, I didn’t. What else did you expect?”
We stared at each other, the weight of his words hitting home because none of this was what he wanted. After all this time, he still blamed me for getting him into this mess.
