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He slams into me again, and I shatter. It’s oblivion on a razor’s edge. Where pleasure and pain meet and mingle in a way only a few can really understand. When he squeezes me tighter and slams into me one more time, I can feel that hot jet of him deep inside me. His groan is obscene and turns me on all over again.
I let my eyes drift closed in the aftermath, and I sleep without nightmares for the first time in years.
24
IVAN
In the morning, I wake early, the sun barely glinting through the windows. Cilla lies on her stomach beside me, one leg tucked up so her knee juts out almost over the edge of the bed. Her hands are tucked under her pillow, and her ass and thighs are still faintly pink from her punishment.
It wasn’t the wedding night I had ever imagined. Not that I’d imagined any kind of long-term relationship. I figured I’d be dead by thirty. The victim of my own reckless anger and an impromptu overreaction.
I carefully climb out of bed, arranging the blankets to cover her bare thighs. While I dress, I keep my eyes on her. Yesterday was stressful for her, so I want her to stay in bed and rest for now.
In my usual white button-down and black slacks, I head toward the command center to find Kai.
Facing the wall of computers on the far side of the large round table, he leans back in a chair, his jacket off, vest unbuttoned, sleeves rolled up. In his mouth, he’s rolling around a lollipop while he types at a furious pace at the keyboard on his lap.
I wait until he notices me, so I don’t cause him to lose his spot. When his fingers slow, and he glances up at me, he tugs the lollipop from his lips. “Shouldn’t you be in bed…with your wife?”
I flip him off and face his screens. “What are you doing?”
He hits a few keys, clearing away coding screens to reveal a map. “It’s a diagram of the city where we’ve seen strange occurrences of drugs. Or rather strange drug sales.”
“Can you do any research on local chemists? Professors or working chemists who might be helping Arthur with his business?”
Kai shift in the chair and resettles his feet up on the table, pushing him back in the chair. I keep my eyes on the screen while he types away, searching through whatever he searches for to find the answers.
While he’s typing, he says, “I’m a little worried about you, man.”
I don’t even justify his statement with a look. “Go mama bear one of the twins, Kai. I don’t need you to worry about me.”
“The twins have each other to lean on. You don’t let yourself lean on anyone.”
I face him, my eyes narrowed. “And who do you lean on, Kai?”
“Adrian. My sisters. I have people in my life. You might have Priscilla now, but I’d bet my favorite suit you don’t open up to her.”
“Why would I? This is a marriage of convenience. It’s a way to keep her safe. I don’t need to open up to the woman who helped kidnap and keep me hostage.”
Kai continues to type, the sound of clacking filling the room. I don’t understand how he can think with the racket he makes. Maybe I should get him some noise-canceling headphones for Christmas. Or myself some if I have to stay in this room much longer.
“Are you going to grill me or search for what I asked?”
Kai bites down, crunching on his lollipop. “Calm the fuck down, man. You’re the one who asked me to do this. It’s not a fucking Google search. Give me a minute.”
Needing to justify…something…I keep watching the screen. “You would do the same if you were in my shoes. Hell, you killed anyone involved in holding you. Why is it when I do the same thing, somehow something to worry about?”
We lapse into silence while Kai executes his search. I don’t need to talk about things, and usually, neither does Kai. Maybe everyone pairing off into relationships has made the team soft. Although, once upon a time, I would swear nothing could soften Adrian from the rigid stone statue his father created him to be.
Kai continues his work, and eventually, I grab a cup of coffee from the machine at the far end of the room. While I sip the hot liquid, Kai types, and types, and types some more. It all looks like gibberish to me, but I know he’s good at what he does. I might have a few contacts on the street, but I wouldn’t trust anyone else with this research.
I swallow a wave of guilt, pull out a chair beside Kai, and sit to watch him work. We stay silent, and that’s fine for both of us. After a while, he prints a list and slides it down the table to me.
