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“It wasn’t just that. I’d also forgotten to cancel Ellie’s swimming course and had an angry call about that, along with a lecture about the importance of kids being able to swim. I felt as though I was neglecting Ellie by not having her in lessons this week. Which I realise sounds ridiculous. I think the other thing was that …” She put her hands up to her face. “This is so embarrassing, but the other night when we went out, I had such a great night. I don’t remember the last time I enjoyed myself that much. So when I got those phone calls it almost felt like the universe telling me not to be so selfish, and that I should be thinking of my responsibilities instead of spending my time daydreaming about you.” She winced in humiliation as she finally stopped talking.
“I was daydreaming about you a lot too,” he said, looking at her intently. “After you told me to back off, I kept wanting to come and check you were okay …”
“You’re far too nice. When you didn’t answer the door tonight I thought it was because you were hiding from me, and I really couldn’t blame you.”
“I wasn’t hiding. I had to force myself to stay out of the way today.” He gave a crooked smile. “When someone accuses you of crowding them, you kind of feel as though you shouldn’t go near them again.”
“I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said all that stuff. I didn’t mean any of it.”
He tilted his head. “I was being a bit intense.”
“No, you weren’t.” She thought back on it. “Okay, maybe you were, but I encouraged it.”
His gaze landed on the laptop.
“Did I interrupt you? I can go and leave you to work.”
“I was just trying to get some stuff out of the way so I can take a couple of days off. Do you still want to go to Tresco on Thursday?”
“I’d love to.” She forced herself to stand, desperate to stay but not wanting to make a nuisance of herself. “Are you going to Bryher tomorrow?” she asked when he walked around the front of the house with her.
“Yes.”
“To visit your brother?”
“Yeah.” He looked puzzled.
“Your mum went yesterday. She was telling me about him.”
He stopped at the gate, pushing the toe of his shoe into the gravel. “I’d invite you along but Lowen can be a bit …” He dragged his teeth along his lower lip. “He’s not always the most sociable.”
“I wasn’t angling for an invite,” she said, not entirely sure that was true. Now that she’d decided to stay, she was desperate to spend more time with Trystan.
“Well, I would invite you … it’s just a bit tense with Lowen sometimes.”
“Don’t you get on?”
“Um …” His gaze shifted behind her, to the water which had turned a soft pink with the setting sun. “It’s complicated.”
“I’m being nosey. Sorry.”
He grinned. “Has anyone ever told you that you apologise a lot?”
“Not really. But you might be right. Or I just have a lot to apologise for around you.”
“You don’t.” He licked his lip and her heart fluttered as she anticipated kissing him. “Thanks for coming over.”
“You’re welcome.” She felt like an idiot, grinning up at him, hoping he’d kiss her.
“So, I’ll see you on Thursday, if not before.”
“Yes.” She took a step backwards. “Great. Have a good day tomorrow.”
“Goodnight,” he called and headed back to his laptop.
Wandering back along the lane and through the garden, Beth was left feeling slightly deflated. It had gone well, she supposed. Trystan had been lovely and understanding so she should be grateful for that. It was the lack of physical contact that bothered her. Of course it was completely her own fault. What did she expect after the way she’d snapped at him?
He might be understanding, but he probably wasn’t going to forget that in a hurry.
