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“We wouldn’t get in trouble. If a worker said anything, I’d act like we’d been looking for them and I found them before you.”
“Devlyn,” she says, laughing harder. “Seriously, stop.”
“Fine,” I huff out. “Party pooper.”
I follow Shelly up and down the aisles. We stare at hundreds of baby products and read the packages of the ones we have no clue what their purpose is. Then I remember something Cora said.
“Hey, shouldn’t we start a registry for the shower?”
Shelly pulls out her phone. “Oh, yeah.” She pulls up the Target app and taps a few times until she reaches the registry she set up earlier. “All we need to do is scan things and add them to our wish list.”
For whatever reason, I don’t feel the need to add an overabundance of items. Just necessities. Then again, this is a wish list and what the hell do I know when it comes to babies. Maybe we will need the wipes warmer and double electric breast pump. Maybe we need the video baby monitor that connects to our phone and the ultrasonic humidifier. Hell if I know.
My vision grows hazy as Shelly wanders and scans items on the shelves. Bottles and nipples. Diapers and burp cloths. Tubs and toiletries. Toys and clothes. Once she has half the baby department logged on the registry, she stows her phone in her purse and hooks my arm with hers.
“I want to buy something for the baby.” She rubs a hand over her belly as her sparkly blues meet my greens. “The baby will get a ton of gifts from other people, but I want them to have something just from us. Doesn’t have to be big. A small toy or their first book.”
Twisting to face Shelly, I frame her face with my hands and pull her in for a kiss. Not a juicy public display, but a sweet kiss that tells her I love the idea.
“Anything in mind?” I ask.
“No. Let’s wander a little more. Maybe something will stand out.”
We weave through the department again, but this time with new eyes. On the hunt for the perfect first gift for our upcoming little one. Hands laced, we wander with no destination. Shelly picks up a small puppy dog toy. Black and white and red. Parts of it soft while other parts crinkle or rattle. The tag says it is perfect for sensory stimulation.
“How about this?” she asks. “It’s cute and functional.”
“And is gender neutral, which is good for us.”
We both smile and stare down at the bright and bold puppy toy. Awe hits me square in the chest. Obviously, Iknowwe are having a baby. Purchasing our first baby item… it’s a whole new level of reality. It has my stomach flipping and fluttering. Adds a new dose of thrill and eagerness.
I hope the baby has Shelly’s dazzling eyes and cute nose, as well as her kind heart and brilliance. More than anything, I just want our child to be healthy and happy.
Hand in hand, we wind our way out of the baby maze and make our way to the checkout. Shelly leans into me and I give her hand a light squeeze. As we round the end of the aisle near the registers, my feet stick to the floor and my legs lock in place.
Can life quit throwing curveballs?
I don’t know what the hell I did, but I swear I will make up for it. Whateveritis.
Less than ten feet in front of us, Kelsey stands in the checkout line with a small basket in her hand. Maybe I can steer us right and she won’t see me. But just as I shift us and point to a register with a shorter line, I hear my name.
“Devlyn? Is that you?”
Someone, anyone, send help.
Had she not spoken loud enough for Shelly to hear, I would have ignored her. But Shelly perked up at my name. I spin us slightly and meet the eyes of my first love. The girl who pulverized my heart five years ago. Someone I planned to never see again.
But the universe is intent on torturing me for some reason.
My hold on Shelly tightens as I say, “Hey, Kelsey.”
Shelly jolts beside me. “Kelsey,Kelsey?” Shelly whisper-asks.
I give her hand a squeeze. A small assurance that everything will be fine. “Mm-hmm.”
“How’ve you been?” Kelsey asks with too much excitement in her voice. “It’s been what… five years?”
If my life could be summarized into one word this past year, it would be perplexing. Every sordid moment of my past has made some strange appearance. Like the universe is testing me on every level. Seeing if I am worthy and capable and strong enough to move forward. Not just on my own, but with Shelly and the baby.
