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For some reason, that was the wrong thing to say.
Her sated body went from lax to stiff in the span of seconds.
“Would you like anything else today?” Our server chose that moment to interrupt us, and I had no clue yet if that was for the best.
“We’ll take two coffees, please, to go. Cream and sugar for both.”
At Bailey’s quick reply, he nodded. “Be right back.”
Then we were two again.
For some reason, beads of sweat formed at my brow. “Hit me. I can see that you have something to get off your chest.”
“You’ve always known my tells, haven’t you?” My girl sat back, arms crossed over her chest. “Sometimes you know me better than I know myself.”
“I do.” Mimicking her pose, I sat back.
“Then I am waiting.” Our server came back then with our coffees in hand and our check. He placed both down and bid us a good evening before rushing off to help a waitress with her large party.
“That’s a conversation best had in private.” Dropping a few bills on the table, I stood, picked up my cup, and extended my other hand out. “Come with me.”
“Seems like all my life I’ve followed your lead.”
“And I ask you to do so once more. Let me explain,” I implored, begged with my eyes for her to follow and hear me out. Luckily, she did. Hand in mine, she followed me out and back toward the beach while sipping her coffee.
We didn’t talk. Not so much as a smile while I found us a quiet spot on the sand and sat down with her between my legs. She didn’t protest. Instead, she let me lead her into my arms with her back to my chest and my thighs surrounding hers.
There were still quite a few people up and down the beach, but here in this spot, it was just the two of us looking out toward the vast ocean.
It was when she let out a long sigh that I spoke.
“How much do you remember of that night in the pool four years ago?”
“Everything.” No hesitation.
“And did anything about my behavior stand out to you?” The wind around us picked up a tiny bit, and my girl shivered. I pulled my shirt off and sat back enough to pull it over her head and thread her arms through it.
“Thanks,” she spoke low, but I heard.
“You’re welcome, babe. Now please answer the question.” Wrapping my arm around her waist, I breathed in her soft scent. “Did I seem off to you?”
Bailey broke out in goose bumps. “You were upset over Erica—”
“Let me stop you right there.” With the tip of my finger, I turned her face back to mine. “It was never about her that night. We were done. That part of my life never made sense and when we broke it off, it felt right. Was right.”
“So why the gutted expression. You looked so down…” her voice became thick and she had to stop and clear her throat “…hurt.”
“To be honest, not until recently did I understand my reactions that night. Why I was in the mood you found me in.”
“Then explain, because I—”
“I was leaving you, Bailey.” At my confession, a small gasp escaped her, and she looked away. Tried and failed to hide the tear that fell from her eye. And even though I wanted nothing more than for our stare to be locked for this next part, I continued. “Leaving you here while I went to school—the fact that you’d be growing up without me, ate at me like nothing else. You wouldn’t have my protection. I wouldn’t be here to scare guys off or knock out the first fucker that made you cry. That separation didn’t feel right, and it was something that I didn’t know how to handle.”
“Because of me? I don’t know…I’m lost here, Miles. Help me understand.”
“A part of my heart recognized in you its other half while my brain rejected the idea. You were young and up until that night, I’d never seen you as anything other than a sibling. A friend.”
“It was a shock to your system,” she added, nodding to herself. That reaction didn’t tell me much, but at least she wasn’t getting up and slapping me.
